


Out of Water, I Am Nothing

by BreeTaylor



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF, Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Surfing, Basically in which Michael is competitive as fuck and Gavin just wants to be friends, Competition, Hawaii, I don't know what else to tag, M/M, Michael swears a lot?, Surfing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-21
Updated: 2015-12-19
Packaged: 2017-12-20 21:17:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 31,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/891963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BreeTaylor/pseuds/BreeTaylor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Michael Jones was the shit in the world of surfing. Undoubtedly unbeatable. So who the fuck was Gavin Free?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In Which Michael is Annoyed and Gavin is New

Michael Jones was the shit. He was at the top of the world, both in and outside of surfing. Endless streams of girls, parties littered with stars, and pay cheques with more zeroes than most people could ever imagine made life the best it could possibly be for him. On top of it all, he was yet to run into a component who came even close to beating him in the competitions he entered. Which is why the random appearance of some newbie named Gavin Free was immediately shrugged off.

“Michael, stop being a dick. He’s new to the business, he probably doesn’t know anyone. Just invite him to the damn party.” As much as he loved her, Michael genuinely hated Lindsay sometimes.

“Yeah, he’s probably some idiot who thinks he’s the shit. I don’t want to deal with that again.”

“Michael,” Lindsay sighed, “Don’t be a prick.”

“Linds—”

“No. I’m going to give him an invite, you’re going to shut up and at least try to be friendly for once, and everything will go splendidly.” She sauntered off and down the hallway towards the office she had claimed for herself in his apartment. Michael sighed and leaned his head back against his couch, listening to the ever-constant sounds of the waves breaking and crashing. He loved what he did, truly he did, but he really hated having to play nice around a bunch of fucktards who thought that they were the best thing to walk the earth. He just wanted to surf, and he’d always felt most comfortable alone on his board, waiting for the waves.

Really, the main reason he chose to move to Hawaii was for the solidarity. It was easy enough to blend into the crowd at first, just follow the island flow, but as he climbed his way to the top in the surfing world he was faced with tourists recognizing him everywhere he went. Fuck, he couldn’t even go to the grocery store without at least five people stopping him before he got to the milk.

To make it better, Lindsay had decided to take the role of his manager and PA. And according to Lindsay, it was best for his career to hold bi-monthly dinner parties for some of the head honchos in the business. Michael did have to admit that he had grown to almost enjoy them, for the most part. Usually it was just him, Geoff—who was his coach, and almost always a little tipsy—his wife Griffon, Jack, who was his first (and favorite) sponsor and made the best fucking boards, Ryan, Michael wasn’t really sure of his importance anymore, but he was a pretty decent guy, and Ray, who was possibly the only other surfer that Michael could stand and still one of the few people who stood any chance of kicking his ass.

Additions to the group were rare and Michael always felt weird about them. Lindsay had tried to invite a newbie before—Caleb Delencour—and he ended up hanging around long enough to get some information on Michael before pissing off. If he hadn’t been a pretty fucking awful surfer, he could’ve easily used what he had learned to kick Michael’s ass. Needless to say, he was a little apprehensive of newbies. But Gavin was staying with the Ramsey’s and if Geoff trusted him enough to let him stay in his home, Michael had to assume he was an okay guy. And if Geoff was willing to train him alongside Michael, he had to be pretty fucking good.

“Good news!” Lindsay smiled as she bounded cheerfully back into the room, “Gavin has enthusiastically accepted!” She giggled and plopped down on the couch next to him, poking at his cheek like she always did when she wanted him to smile. It worked. “Hey, did you know he’s British?”

Michael raised an eyebrow, “Is he?” Lindsay nodded, “Huh. No I didn’t. You don’t really see a lot of British surfers, though.”

“That’s true.”

“How does he know the Ramsey’s, anyway?”

Lindsay shrugged, “Not sure. I think Geoff said he saw a video of Gavin surfing online? Apparently, before Geoff approached him, he had never even thought of surfing professionally. He’d never competed.”

“What?” Michael shook his head, “No. No fucking way.”

“No, seriously. Geoff was just telling me about it. Apparently he blew through the first competition he was in. According to Geoff, he’s going to be at your level within weeks.”

“So this kid just… randomly knows how to surf?”

“I guess? All I know is that he only posted that video to show off some sort of slow-motion camera. Fucking lucky break, though, right?” She shrugged, “You really should stop calling him a kid, though. He’s your age.”

Michael nodded, but didn’t say anything. Geoff thought he would be ready to compete at his level in weeks. A random British guy with no real experience. He would have to have a heck of a lot of raw talent to have Geoff be that confident in him. Needless to say, Michael was interested in meeting him.

* * *

Ryan, as usual, arrived first to the dinner, closely followed by Jack and Ray. Michael said some short ‘hello’s, but his mind was preoccupied with the thought of meeting miracle-kid Gavin Free. Naturally, though, Geoff was almost always late, and tonight was no different. He sauntered through the door—without knocking—half an hour after he was supposed to arrive, with Griffon trailing in behind him all apologies and “God, he’s an idiot sometimes, I’m sorry”. Shortly behind her walked in Gavin Free. Michael looked him over, taking into note that he was a tiny bit shorter than him—roughly an inch or two—and that Gavin was considerably scrawnier than him. His hair stuck up in weird angles that were not all purposeful, but definitely what was considered “stylish”, and to top it all off he was grinning like an idiot.

“Hello!” He said cheerfully once he caught Michael’s eye, “I’m Gavin! You must be Michael!”

He already kind of hated how chipper he was, but Michael tried his hardest to be polite, taking Gavin’s offered hand and allowing his arm to be heaved up and down a few times. “Yeah. Nice to meet you.”

“Wow, Michael. Your place is _top!_ ” He moved closer to Michael, lowering his voice and glancing around, “Don’t tell Geoff, but it’s much nicer than his place. You’re _right_ on the beach!”

“Yeah, well, surfing is my job.”

“I know. Geoff’s told me all about you!” Gavin, Michael realized as he watched the man speak, hands flying around and face animated with glee, was really fucking talkative. It was really fucking annoying. “—and you haven’t been beaten yet, right? That’s pretty cool!”

“Yeah, sure. Uh, Lindsay?” Michael called, watching as she appeared at the end of the hallway leading to her office.

“Yeah—oh, hi Gavin!” She smiled brightly at him, “Glad you could come. I’ll introduce you to everyone, since I know Michael didn’t do it.”

“That’d be top, thanks.”

“We’ll leave Mr. Grumpy to himself.” Lindsay joked as she pulled Gavin towards Jack, sticking her tongue out at him for good measure. Michael sometimes missed dating her, but at the same time he liked having her as his friend. The feelings required for a relationship that she deserved just weren’t there for Michael. They never had been. For as long as he could remember, the only thing that he loved wholly and truly was surfing.

“So what do you think?” Geoff asked from beside him, pulling Michael out of his thoughts and making him jump.

“Of what?”

“Of Gavin, what else do you think?”

“He’s…” Michael tried to find a sort of nice think to say. “He’s… enthusiastic?”

“He’s kind of a little shit.”

Michael laughed, reminded once again of why he liked Geoff so much, “Yeah, kind of.”

“But he’s a really fucking talented little shit.”

“So I’ve heard.”

“I’m going to be bringing him to training in the morning.”

“What?” Michael quickly shook his head, “No, I don’t think so. You know the rules, Geoff.”

“Oh stop being a baby. It’ll be good for both of you.” Michael tried to argue, but Geoff held up a hand. “No, don’t even try it. He’s annoying as dicks and I’m going to murder him if I’m left by myself with him.”

“Don’t you remember what happened with Caleb?”

“Do you really think he’s that clever, Michael?”

“Well—I mean…” He sighed in defeat, “I guess not.”

“Good, I’ll see you tomorrow morning, five o’clock sharp.”


	2. In Which Michael Gets the Surprise He Never Wanted

                Michael loved living on the beach. He loved being able to stumble out of bed at 4:00, have a quick pre-training snack (usually mango, because c’mon. Mangos are fucking delicious) and then simply walk two minutes down to his beach and still beat Geoff by a minimum of half an hour. Though Geoff was almost always a half hour late, anyway. Regardless, the simplicity of it, of always having the ocean right there, was why Michael had a house built in just the right spot for perfect waves. 

                Which is why, when Geoff finally stumbled onto the beach at 5:30 with Gavin in tow, Michael was already far off-shore and waiting for a good wave. “Michael!” He heard Geoff call, but chose to ignore him. He wanted to get a least one wave before the boring pre-surfing training session. He was hoping to wait for the best wave available, but the next one would have to do. He breathed deeply, feeling the unformed waves bellow him in the most unexplainable way. He moved into position without thought, and then he was moving. Paddling, keeping himself just on top of the wave until it just about reached its peak.

One of Michael’s favorite parts of surfing is the first couple of seconds after standing firmly on the board, the first couple of hesitant seconds where falling is still possible. That one second where his heart would speed up in anticipation for the upcoming events. Michael lived for it, he lived for all of it. Since he was barely warmed up, he refrained from doing anything too straining, instead sticking to simpler tricks so Geoff wouldn’t freak.

After riding the wave to its fullest, Michael slowly made his way back to the shore. He loved surfing, he hated Geoff’s training. As effective as it was, it was a pain in the ass and he was perpetually sore in at least one of his limbs. “Hurry the fuck up!” Geoff shouted from the shoreline, “We’re not waiting all day for your lazy ass!”

“Yeah, yeah.” Michael treaded out of the water, “Technically I was training.”

“Too fucking bad, you know that’s not how things work.”

“Michael, that was amazing!” Gavin said, way to chipper for the early hour. “You’re brilliant!”

“Uh, thanks?”

“That run was weak as shit, actually,” Geoff cut in, “You’re slacking.”

“I was waiting for your sorry ass to show up, it was a relax run.”

Geoff shook his head, “You know you can still train without me. Seriously, this is what? The second year I’ve been training you. Haven’t you picked up anything?”

Michael was about to throw back another sly remark when Gavin started giggling. Actually, genuinely, fucking giggling. Like a fucking schoolgirl. Both Michael and Geoff turned to stare at him. “You guys are a laugh. Seriously, he’s like your father or something.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Let’s get to it, fucktards.”

* * *

Michael was genuinely surprised with how well Gavin held up under Geoff’s training. He half expected him to crap out half way through the running exercises, but the scrawny Brit powered through, even out ran Michael for short bursts at a time. Even through the push-ups, sit-ups and crunches, Gavin kept going with little complaining. Finally, Geoff allowed them to get into the water, and finally Michael would get to see just what Gavin was made of.

“Alright, so I want you guys to just see how long you can ride a wave okay?” Geoff shouted from his place on the shore.

“Why?” Gavin shouted back.

“He wants to see how you pick your waves. The better the wave, the longer you’ll be able to ride it, and the longer you ride it, the better control you have over your board.” Michael explained. “He wants to know how much you’re relying on talent over actual skill.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, so try not to fuck up.”

“Michael, you first!” Geoff shouted. Michael nodded and paddled out farther into the water. He could feel Gavin’s eyes on him, and it was unexpectedly strange. Normally Michael didn’t give a shit who was watching, rarely ever taking any sort of notice, but it was almost as if Gavin’s eyes bore into the back of his head. He forced himself to focus, running his fingertips over the currently calm water and waiting, feeling for the wave. He was just about in the perfect mindset when Gavin’s voice pierced through his thoughts.

“What are you doing, Michael?”

“I’m finding a good wave, now shut the fuck up!” Michael shouted back. He was determined to find a good wave, no matter how long it took. Gavin was going to see how good he is, and he was going to think twice about competing against him.

It took less than ten minutes to find a good wave, even with Gavin questioning his methods multiple times. It wasn’t the perfect wave, but it was good and Michael managed to ride it all the way back to shore, where Geoff was waiting and failing to hide his proud smile. “Not bad, Michael.” Geoff said as Michael joined him on the beach, “Gav, you’re up!”

Gavin threw a thumbs up their way before paddling farther out like Michael had. It became clear, as Gavin began running his hands along the surface of the water with a determined (see: constipated) look on his face that he was trying to copy what Michael had done. Judging by his less-than-pleased expression, he wasn’t getting the results he was hoping for. It only took five minutes for Gavin to give up completely and grab the next available wave. Thanks to impatience he only made it half as far as Michael before he had to bail out. He looked incredibly disappointed with himself as he trudged onto the beach and over to where Michael and Geoff were standing.

“I don’t know how you do it, Michael,” He whined, “You’re so good.”

“He is.” Geoff stated, “Which is why he’s gonna mentor you.”

“ _What?!_ ” Michael exclaimed at the same time Gavin squeaked out an excited, _“Really?!”_

“Yup. I think it’ll be a good experience for both of you. Plus, Michael’s got an extra room and I don’t think that sleeping on my hide-a-bed is good for your back or my sanity.”

“You expect me to let him _live_ here? _With me?_ ”

“Yeah, and you’re going to fucking deal with it for a week.”

“No way, Geoff.” Michael shook his head quickly. “This is where I draw the line.”

Geoff glanced at Gavin, who looked rather crushed, and then tightly gripped Michael’s elbow so he could drag him just out of earshot. “Look,” He sighed, “Gavin could do with a mentor, but he could also do with a _friend_. The kid just up and left his entire life behind, moved away from his family and friends and to an island he’d never been to. He’s going to need someone who knows what that’s like. It’s one week, Michael. That’s all I ask. After that you can kick him back to my doorstep, if it’s that painful for you to be around him.”

Michael sighed, “One week?”

“One week.”

“Fine. Whatever.” He looked over at Gavin, who was staring out at the ocean with a peaceful happiness. Michael knew what it felt like, looking out at the ocean and feeling at home. He just never really expected to see that look on anyone else’s face. “Go get his shit.”


	3. In Which Gavin Gets Really Fucking Excited About Everything

Gavin had a lot of shit. Apparently Geoff wasn’t kidding when he said that the Brit had packed up his entire life as Michael was currently staring at it. In boxes scattered around his living room. With Gavin himself standing in the middle of it all. “What the fuck _is_ all this?”

“Oh, y’know… stuff.”

“Is this everything you own, or what?”

Gavin shrugged, looking sheepish. “Not all of it, no.”

“Whatever.” Michael sighed and gestured down the hallway, “Your room is down that hall, across from Lindsay’s office.”

Gavin nodded and picked up one of the boxes, but he paused before reaching the hallway. When he spoke, he sounded quieter and more serious than Michael had ever heard him sound. “Is Lindsay your girlfriend?”

“No. Not anymore.”

Gavin tilted his head to one side curiously, “Why? What happened?”

“That’s not really any of your fucking business, is it?” Michael snapped. Gavin took a step back, obviously more than a little confused over the outburst.

“Well sorry for trying to get to know the person that is supposed to be mentoring me for the next week.” He spit back, “Jesus, no need to be such a tosser.”

As he watched Gavin spin and stalk down the hallway, Michael couldn’t help the remorse that quickly rose in his gut. Technically the guy hadn’t done anything wrong aside from catch him off guard. It wasn’t as if Gavin knew it was a sore spot for him, the guy barely knew anything past his name and his (pretty fucking impressive) surf career. With a sigh, he picked up one of the boxes and made his way over to Gavin’s room, where the door had only just slammed shut. He knocked lightly on the door, choosing to respect his privacy and not simply barge in with the pretense of “it’s my fucking house”.

“What?” Came Gavin’s reply, cold and unyielding.

“I have one of your damn boxes,” Michael replied, “A pretty fucking heavy one, at that.” The door opened and Gavin reached for the box, grabbing it with a quiet mutter of ‘thanks’.

Michael sighed. “Look, Gavin. I didn’t mean to act like a dick, okay? Lindsay was my girlfriend. We broke up because I couldn’t commit to a relationship in the same way she wanted… that she needed, really. We’re still good friends and she’s more or less become my manager. End of story.”

“You really hate having me here, don’t you Michael?” Gavin asked.

“I just… I like my space. It’s why I live alone. It’s why my house is surrounded by things that block people out.” He paused, and then added, “It’s not just you, I wouldn’t want Geoff living here either.”

“It’s only for one week, though.”

“Yeah, I know. Now hurry up and get your stuff set up. The surf’s going to be good around three, and there’s no way in hell we’re missing that.”

* * *

Michael didn’t normally enjoy surfing with other people. It was why he had a house on the water. It was why his beach was private. And yet, somehow Gavin’s presence was… surprisingly okay. He seemed to calm down a bit in the water, and at the very least he seemed to be more focused on what he was doing. Michael, for the first time in a long time, found someone who enjoyed surfing in the same way he did. Someone who enjoyed surfing for surfing. It wasn’t about being the best while they were out there, by themselves. Instead, it was just two guys and a couple of great waves. How it should be, really.

Even though Gavin lacked some of the basic skills that Michael had gained over time and training, he had a hell of a lot of raw passion. He was pulling tricks that were the same difficulty as the ones Michael was doing, and although his were a bit sloppier in terms of technique, he was doing them well. Michael found himself actually enjoying being out there with the little shit, and they both returned to the house laughing.

“What are we doing for supper, Michael?”

“I don’t know, what do you want to do?”

“I’m up for anything!”

“Well, I didn’t take out enough meat for two people, so unless you’re a vegetarian we’re probably going to have to go out for dinner.”

“That sounds like fun, Michael!” Gavin said enthusiastically, beaming at him. “Where should we go?”

“I know somewhere down in Kona, go get in the car while I lock up.”

“Shouldn’t we change?”

“Nah, this place is pretty chill.”

* * *

They arrived at the Kona Canoe Club just past four, Michael trying to ignore Gavin as he pointed out all the shops saying, “Oh they’re so cute, Michael!” at everything. Much to their luck, just as they arrived, a table right along the banister freed up. Michael quickly made his way over, plopping down in one of the wicker chairs and staring out over the crashing waves of the ocean. The torches had just been lit, and their flames flickered in the breeze.

“This restaurant is top, Michael!” Gavin cooed. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen a restaurant without any windows or walls! It’s so open!”

“Yeah, it’s pretty cool.” Michael agreed just as their waitress made her way over.

“Hey, Michael. How’re you today?” She asked.

“I’m good Susie, how’s the flow been today?”

“Pretty busy, for the most part. Nice to see a familiar face for once, though.” She smiled, and then turned to Gavin, “Who’s your friend?”

“I’m Gavin Free!” He was almost bouncing in his chair as he spoke, extending a hand out to her. She looked at it quizzically for a moment before hesitantly taking it. “It’s very nice to meet you.”

“Aren’t you energetic.” She chuckled, handing them their menus, even though she knew Michael didn’t need one and had already written down his order. “New to Kona?”

“Yuppers! Just got here two days ago, actually!” Gavin opened the menu, eyes barely scanning it before he closed it. “What’s good, Michael?”

“I don’t know, everything?”

“What should I get?”

“I don’t fucking know!”

Gavin, unfazed, turned back to Susie, “What do you recommend?”

“We just got some fresh Mahi Mahi today, and I’ve gotten nothing but positive feedback so far.”

“Great! I’ll have that.”

“The usual for you, Michael?” He nodded, “And a Coors?”

“Sure, but might as well fill it up.” Susie smiled and nodded, sauntering off to the kitchen to place their orders.

“This is so cool, Michael.” Gavin gushed.

“So you’ve said.”

“Look how close we are to the ocean!”

“Yup.”

“There’s not even a window to block it out!”

Michael sighed, “Gavin.”

“How is this place not packed?”

“Gavin,” He said a bit louder.

“I should take a picture. Dan would be so jealous.”

“Gavin!” Michael shouted, finally getting his attention.

“Yes, Michael?” He asked, completely unfazed.

“Do you have to act like a fucking tourist? It’s pretty, that’s awesome. No need to go on about it for-fucking-ever.”

Gavin went uncharacteristically quiet, staring down at the table and fiddling with his napkin. “I’m sorry.”

Michael sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. “No, it’s... it’s fine. Just take it easy, okay? The rest of us can’t keep up.”

“So I’ve heard.” Gavin turned to look back to the ocean, his shoulders drooping. “I think my parents were thrilled when I told them I was coming here. Don’t blame ‘em though, what kind of 24 year old lives at home?”

“Don’t be ridiculous.”

“No, really, Michael. They told me they were relieved.”

“Whatever. They’re fucking retarded, then.”

“Michael!” Gavin gasped.

“No, fuck that. Parents aren’t supposed to say that shit.” Gavin, for once in his life, didn’t argue. A silence fell over them that was far from comfortable as they both fidgeted with whatever they could find. Michael had never been so thankful as when Susie came back with their drink.

“Food’ll be out in a minute, boys.”

“Woah, Michael, what is that?”

“It’s an easier way of serving beer.” Michael shrugged, “Hell of a lot faster.”

“I have to take a picture of this one, Michael!” Gavin chuckled, taking his phone out of his pocket and leaning back dangerously far in his chair so he could get the entirety of it in his shot. “Dan’s going to come visit, just for this.”

** **

“Who’s Dan?” Michael asked as he filled his glass.

“Ah, my best mate back home.”

“He isn’t some sort of freakishly good surfer, too, is he?”

Gavin chuckled, filling up his own glass. “Nah, he’s an army man.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I reckon he’s going to be in the next Black Ops.”

“Huh.”

“I think you’d like him, Michael.” Gavin hummed, taking a large gulp of his drink, “He’s pretty badass.”

“Well I’m sure you’ll introduce us if he ever comes here.”

“Of course I will! It’ll be tippity toppers.” Michael tried his hardest to ignore Gavin’s vocabulary, he really did, but try as he may he couldn’t help but laughing. The guy was bazaar as fuck, but at least he was amusing.

* * *

Dinner went surprisingly well. Gavin only took four more pictures, and only one was of Michael. By the time they were ready to head back, both of them had sobered up enough to drive, though Michael found out at that point that Gavin couldn’t actually drive. Anywhere in the world. They made it home in one piece, if not a little tired, and Gavin immediately staggered into his room.

Michael, instead, sat on his back porch, a new beer in hand, and watched as the waves crashed their way to the shore. He loved watching as they rolled along the surface, calm and peaceful before they began collapsing into themselves; barrelling. Knowing how it felt to be in that barrel only made it better for Michael, and sometimes it was if the waves called to him.

“It really is beautiful, isn’t it?” Gavin asked from the doorway, startling him.

“Yeah.” Michael nodded, “Yeah, it is.”

“You’re so lucky to live so close to it, Michael.”

“I know.” They fell into a comfortable silence, both listening as the waves continued to crash and watching as they were illuminated by the setting sun. “Have you always lived here?” Gavin asked after a moment. “On the island, I mean. Obviously not here as in this house.”

“Nah, I grew up in Jersey. Moved here two years ago when my career picked up.”

“New Jersey? Really?”

“Yeah. My parents liked to visit California, and one year I just decided to rent a board and see if I could do it. Apparently I could.”

“When was that?”

“Two and a half years ago.”

“What? That soon?”

Michael chuckled, looking over his shoulder at Gavin long enough to shake his head in disbelief. “The same thing happened with you, Gav.”

“Well, yeah… But you’re _good_.”

“So’re you.” Michael shrugged. “Geoff saw something in my no one else would’ve dared to see. Just like with you.”

“He’s pretty top, isn’t he?”

“Yeah, he is.”

“He’s gotta be insane though.”

“Completely,” Michael agreed. “You can sit down, you know."

Gavin complied, plopping heavily down on the swinging chair Lindsay had gotten him as a joke. They continued to watch as the sun quickly disappeared into the ocean, slowly blanketing them in darkness. The rhythmic sound of the waves, on top of the admittedly large quantities of beer was lulling Michael into a sleep, and before he knew what was going on, his eyes were drooping shut. The last thing he remembered before being engulfed in darkness was the feeling of his head hitting Gavin’s shoulder.  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the pictures you saw in this chapter were taken by me, and they're from the places I mentioned. Both were taken at the "Kona Canoe Club" Restaurant in Kona, Hawaii. I'm not sure if I'm going to continue including pictures (also knows as Gavin's phone pictures), but I'd love to hear what you think of the idea!


	4. In Which The Mentoring Begins

**Day One**

Michael woke up to the distant, but persistent, sounds of his alarm clock. He groggily blinked in the morning brightness as he waited for his eyes to adjust. As things finally started coming into focus, he realized he was still outside. A quick glance to his right revealed that he had, in fact, fallen asleep on Gavin, who was still dead to the world next to him. Michael sat up, moving a good three inches away from Gavin and stretching out the kink in his neck as he struggled to ignore the cold feeling that spread up his right side.

“Gavin.” He said, his voice rough with sleep. “Gavin.” He repeated, louder and more insistent when the Brit didn’t even flinch, shaking his shoulder for good measure.

“Michael?” Gavin asked groggily, though he slured the word so much it sounded more like _Mi-coool_.

“Wake up, fucktard.”

Gavin’s eyes opened slowly, his head turning so he could make eye contact. “What time is it?”

“4:30.”

“Michael!” Gavin whined. “Why are we up this early?”

“Training.”

“At 4:30 in the morning?”

Michael shrugged. “The good waves come around 5:30, and we still have to do the beach shit.”

Gavin groaned, pushing himself off the chair and stretching, “This sucks knobs.”

“Yeah, well, it works for me and I’m supposed to be mentoring you so you can suck it up.”

“But we can sleep after, right?”

Michael shook his head. “We’ve got press today.”

“Bloody hell.” Gavin sighed, pulling his t-shirt over his head. “At least we’re already dressed, right?”

Michael rolled his eyes but couldn’t help but agreeing. He pulled off his own shirt and draped it over the banister, struggling to ignore how Gavin simply threw his on the porch. He decided to skip the pre-training fruit in favour of getting the morning over with faster.

* * *

Gavin was not pleasant in the early mornings, Michael discovered. The enthusiastic, all-systems go guy that had shown up at his house at 5:30 not twenty-four hours prior had all but vanished, only to be replaced with a whiny pain in the ass.

“Why do we have to do sprints for _ten_ minutes, _Mi-cool_?”

“ _100_ sit-ups? I _can’t, Mi-cool!_ ”

“100 push-ups is _way_ too many, _Mi-cool!_ ”

“ _Mi-cool, Mi-cool, Mi-coooool!_ ”

By the end of training, Michael _hated_ how Gavin would draw out his name in his stupid fucking whiney tone. Which is why, when that whiney call drifted into the kitchen as he was trying to make breakfast (add cooking to the list of things Gavin couldn’t do) he was ready to go out there and stab him with the knife h was currently using to cut mango.

“What?” He shouted back instead.

“Michael, you need to come out here!”

“But it’s important, Michael!”

With a heavy sigh, Michael put down the knife and made his way outside. Gavin, much to his amusement, was surrounded by the wild cats that populated the island. “What the fuck are you doing?” He asked with a chuckle.

“I found your cats!” Gavin exclaimed happily, “You never told me you had cats!”

“That’s ‘cause I don’t, Gav. Those are wild,” Michael paused, “And also have the tendency to be quite vicious.”

“Oh.” Gavin looked disappointed for a grand total of two seconds before a big, goofy grin was back on his face. “I think they like me, Michael!”

“You didn’t feed them, did you?”

“Er…”

“Gavin!”

“They looked so hungry, Michael!” Gavin pouted, “It was just one piece of toast!”

“Well that’s just fucking great, Gavin. Now they’re never going to fucking leave.”

“That’s okay!” He insisted, “They can be our pets!”

Michael ran a hand over his face, pinching the bridge of his nose and attempting to convince himself killing Gavin Free would be a bad idea. “What part of _feral_ do you fail to understand?”

“I think they’re just misunderstood,” Gavin cooed, beginning to bend down in an attempt to pet them that only resulted in them scattering and leaving him alone, confused, and clearly upset.

“Yeah. Misunderstood.” Michael rolled his eyes, “Can I go finish breakfast now?”

“They were all so nice.”

“Gav,” Michael sighed, “They’ll be back tomorrow, alright? Tonight, probably.”

“They were using me, Michael!” Gavin cried, and Michael had to walk away before the temptation to punch his big fucking nose became too insistent to ignore.

* * *

Initially, Michael had been hesitant about Gavin accompanying him to the interview he had with _Carv_ , but Geoff, of course, had called them up and now they were _all for_ Gavin and Michael being interviewed together. The newbie and his mentor. Michael hated it, and he didn’t want to have everyone in the surfing world thinking he was suddenly a people person. Gavin, on the other hand, was over the moon. If the interview had been any farther then the ten minute drive to a hotel in Kona, Michael would’ve made him take a cab. Or walk, he really didn’t fucking care.

“You need to calm the fuck down,” Michael had said, stopping Gavin with a hand on his elbow before he could enter the building. “At least pretend to be professional for this.”

And for all his nodding and insisting, Gavin freaked the fuck out as soon as he met their interviewer for the day, Gus Sorola. “Hello!” He had said cheerily, grabbing Gus’ hand without permission and slamming it up and down as the photographer, who Michael recognized as Burnie Burns, chuckled off to the side. “My name’s Gavin, it’s bloody brilliant to meet you!”

“I’m Gus. Now let go.” Michael snorted, coughing in a pathetic attempt to cover it, “Let’s just get this over with.”

If Michael had to choose a favorite interview team, it would be Burnie and Gus. They were one of the first people to interview him, and they were probably the most chill guys in the business. They didn’t give a fuck if he swore, and they didn’t ask him stupid questions. Hell, they even tended to stop by his dinners when they were in Hawaii.

“So, Michael. This is the first big comp. of the season, how’re you feeling about that?”

“Honestly, Gus, I don’t really give a fuck,” Michael shrugged, “The first comp. is more or less a way to get rid of the guys who can’t handle the pressure.”

Gus nodded, “And Gavin? Will you be competing?”

“Hopefully!” Gavin giggled, which Michael was starting to realize was a nervous habit for him, “As long as my coach gives me the go-ahead I will most definitely be there! It’ll be tippy toppers!”

“Tippy… toppers…” Gus looked over at Burnie, who was almost shitting himself as he struggled not to laugh his ass off. Gus shook his head and obviously decided not to bother lingering on it, instead moving swiftly forward. “Is it true this will only be your second competition?”

“Yup!”

“How the fuck does that work?”

“I’m not really sure, but apparently as long as Geoff okay’s it, I’m good to go!”

“That’s some pretty good beginners luck,” Gus commented, “I don’t think we’ve seen anyone move up that quickly since Michael here. Feeling any pressure to live up to the standards he’s set?”

“Not really. I just love surfing, I don’t care if I don’t make it to the top right away.” Gavin smiled at Michael, “Plus, Michael’s top.”

“Is it true you’re mentoring Gavin, Michael?”

Michael sighed, “Yeah.”

“You usually stay away from the competition, with the exception of Ray Narvaez Jr. of course, what changed with Gavin?”

“I’m sure you know we have the same coach?” Gus nodded, “Well, Geoff thought it’d be good for both of us if I showed him the ropes.”

“And how’s that going?”

“Michael’s an amazing mentor, so far!” Gavin said, just as Michael said, “He complains a lot.”

“It’s obvious your personalities are almost completely opposite to one another, is that hard to deal with?”

“Yes.” Michael said as Gavin said “Nope!”

“I see…” Gus pushed his glasses up his nose, “Michael, do you think Gavin will prosper in the upcoming competition, or do you think three weeks is too little time to make an amateur into an athlete?”

Michael frowned, feeling a stab of anger at the words. He struggled to keep his tone calm as he replied, “Well, Gus, Gavin isn’t exactly an amateur.”

“No? Didn’t he just go through his first, local, competition not two weeks ago?”

“So? He’s fucking talented. That’s all there is to it.”

“More so than the other competitors?”

“You know I won’t comment on that, Gus.”

“Eh, it was worth a try,” He shrugged, “What’ve you been doing so far to mentor him?”

“Nothing really. Today’s the first day, technically.”

“He makes me get up at 4:30 in the morning, is what he does,” Gavin complained, “Bloody sadist.”

“Training.” Michael said simply. He reached over and slapped Gavin on the back just hard enough for it to sting, “If he doesn’t get his scrawny little ass in better shape there’s no way he’ll be competing in three weeks.”

“Michael!” Gavin whined in his oh-so familiar way. “Don’t be a bully.”

“Right, well, that’s all I’ve got, guys.” Gus closed the smart cover on his iPad, “Just get a couple shots with Burnie, and then you’re free to go.”

Michael and Gavin posed for their pictures, a few together and a few alone, and then Michael high-tailed it out of there and back to his jeep. “That was so much fun!” Gavin said as he got into the passenger seat, “Bloody brilliant, wasn’t it?”

“Sure, Gav.” Michael nodded.

“Where to now?”

Michael looked at the clock, it was already 6:30. The interview had taken an hour and a half, which was a hell of a lot longer than it felt. He was suddenly extremely glad they had trained before breakfast and got the good waves in the afternoon before the interview. “Want to see my favorite part of the island before we go back for dinner?”

* * *

Michael had only shown his place to three people. Geoff, Lindsay, and Ray. And even then, it took months for him to finally decide that they were important enough to see it. Taking Gavin to see it was a surprise, even for himself, though he knew almost immediately after offering that he did want to show him it. If he was honest with himself, Michael knew that he wanted to see Gavin smile. He wanted to see his whole face light up as it had the night before when they were on the porch, or whenever they were out on the waves. He didn’t know _why_ he wanted to see it, but that sincere smile is what led Michael down the familiar road to his favorite place, and farther in leading Michael through the barely-there path in the trees skirting the highway.

“This is it,” Michael said as they stood on the edge of a volcanic rock shoreline, the waves crashing around them as they hit the black rock. “It’s not much, I know, but I like it.”

“Michael this place is _amazing_.” Gavin breathed. “It’s so pretty.”

“Yeah, it’s not bad.” Michael stepped onto the rock, moving down to his familiar spot and looking out over the setting sun. He heard the familiar sound of an iPhone taking a picture behind him and couldn’t help but smile. Anyone else, and he would’ve demanded they delete the picture, but somehow he hoped Gavin sent it to whoever that Dan guy was—show him just what he was missing.

****

He listened as Gavin made his way down the rock to sit next to him, both of them falling into the comfortable silence that Michael was beginning to enjoy. “Thanks for showing me this, Michael.” Gavin said quietly. “It’s amazing.”

“Consider it part of my mentoring. I think every good surfer needs a place to relax. Admittedly it’s not always next to the ocean—Ray’s is at home with his Xbox—but it’s important to have a good place to go to just… chill.”

Gavin didn’t say anything for a while, but when he spoke his tone was hesitant. “Hey Michael?”

“Yes, Gavin?”

“Would you mind too terribly much if this was my spot, too?”

Normally, Michael would immediately shoot down the thought. This was his spot, his one place of pure peace and quiet on the island where it could be just him and his thoughts, and the idea of sharing it would bring a bitter taste to his mouth. Somehow, though, when Gavin suggested it Michael immediately said, “Yeah, sure.”

Maybe it would be okay for Gavin to stick around, as long as he stayed quiet. 


	5. In Which Strategies Are Discussed

**Day Two**

                “What are we going to do today, Michael?” Gavin asked, much happier than he had been the previous morning, despite the fact they woke up at the same time and had done the same workout.

“I thought we could discuss some heat strategies.”

“Sure, what’s that?”

“…You’re kidding, right?” Michael watched for any sign that Gavin was just being a shit, but no. He genuinely didn’t know. “You’re expecting to compete in the qualifier comp in three weeks and you don’t even know what fucking heat strategies are? Jesus, I can’t do this.”

“Michael!” Gavin whined, “I’m sorry, Michael!”

“When you get in the water at a comp, what’s your plan?”

“I don’t really plan…”

“I don’t know how you won at that first competition. Did you compete alone?”

“Michael!”

“Do you at least know what a heat _is_?”

“Um, that’s like… the rounds, right?”

“Thank god.” Michael sighed, “So what do you think heat strategies are?”

“Ways to win the heat?” Gavin asked hopefully.

“And look, the fucking retard has a brain.”

“Don’t be mean, Michael!”

“Whatever, let’s just get started.” Michael grabbed a pad of paper from his desk drawer before coming back to where Gavin was sitting on the porch swing. He drew out a rough diagram of a wave, throwing in a few competitors. “Alright, what do you see here?”

“A heat?”

“Yeah, okay, but what do you think are some things that stand out about this heat?”

“I don’t know… there are five people competing?”

“Seriously?” Michael waved a hand when Gavin opened his mouth to defend himself. “Alright, look.” He pointed at the wave first, “This is an A Frame, they’re perfect for barreling, and Hawaii is famous for them. The one thing to keep in mind, though, is not to enter the barrel unless you’re certain you can get out, any ideas why?”

“Well I doubt the judges will give you any points for wiping out.”

Michael smiled, “Yeah, that’s definitely a major part of it. You also lose a lot of time, though, especially if you get pulled under. Which is another reason why you shouldn’t do it if there’s even the slightest chance you’ll bail. If you get locked in the wave, it gets incredibly dangerous and it’s way too easy for it to just take you, y’know?” Gavin nodded, and Michael moved to point away from the barrel of the wave. “Even if you can’t take the barrel, the A Frames are great waves. Good for tricks.”

“If you take any of my advice, though, take this,” Michael said, his tone deadly serious. “Be bold in your moves, but don’t get cocky. Don’t think that just because you’re in the lead you can slack, or worse that you should try something you know you’ve got a good chance of fucking up. As soon as you’re in first you want to _stay_ _solid_. If you’re falling behind, _that’s_ when you want to try stupid shit like that, though Geoff will disagree with me on that.”

Gavin was still nodding as his eyes studied the diagram as he clearly tried to take everything in. “Now, normally the other surfers are easy to ignore,” Michael continued, “I mean, some of them will throw insults and shit, but overall they’re easy to block out. Which is why you’ve got to be really careful of the Snakes.”

“The what?”

“Snakes,” Michael repeated, “The idiots who get greedy and start stealing waves.”

“And what am I supposed to do about them?”

Michael shrugged, “Nothing, try and beat them to it, I guess?”

“That’s stupid,” Gavin pouted, “There’s no rules against that?”

“Not really. And don’t even _think_ about fighting them, or trying to shove them out of the wave. You’ll get hurt, points will be deducted, or worse.”

“I still think that’s ridiculous.”

“Everyone does.” Michael sighed, “Now, let’s move onto tricks.”

* * *

They ended up discussing the different heat tactics Michael had picked up over the competitions he’d competed through lunch, and Michael was surprised with how willing Gavin was to sit and learn. Even his stupid questions slowed down significantly. Michael found that he had actually enjoyed talking strategy and teaching him what he knew, which was more than a little shocking since he hadn’t even wanted to be in his presence two days prior.

“Michael!” Gavin called from the porch, “I thought you said the cats would be back today!”

“Aren’t they?”

“No.”

“Huh,” Michael made his way outside, looking out across his small lawn. Sure enough, not a cat in sight. “I think we better watch the news, Gav.”

“…Why?”

“They only leave if there’s a storm coming.”

Sure enough, when they turned on the morning news there were hurricane warnings flashing across the bottom of the screen. According to the reporter it was small and didn’t look like it’d create any major problems aside from a few days of some nasty wind and rain; maybe a few power outages. Michael wasn’t too worried, he kept prepared and they wouldn’t have to go get supplies in what was surely a hellstorm at the grocery stores. Gavin, however, insisted on seeing all of the supplies that were listed on the TV.

“Are you sure you have enough for _two_ people, Michael?” He asked for the tenth time. “You live alone, are you _sure_ that you’ve prepared for two people?”

“Gavin.” Michael said sternly, “I am positive we’re prepared, okay?”

“You have six gallons of water stored up?”

“I have a fucking ocean on my doorstep.”

“The news lady said you can’t go near the ocean.”

Michael sighed, “I think I’ll be okay if I went down with a bucket for two seconds.”

“We can’t drink salt water,” Gavin pointed out, “It’ll dehydrate us.”

“We can boil it.”

“If the power is out—”

“I have a fire pit.”

“But the rain—”

“It’s covered,” Michael absentmindedly responded as he searched through his games. Hell, if the power was going to go out, he wanted to get some _Halo_ in.

“ _Michael_ —” Gavin started, but before he could said anything Michael stuffed a controller in his hand.

“No, Gavin. We’re fine. You’re going to chill the fuck out and we’re going to play some fucking _Halo_ and I’m going to kick your ass, okay?”

In a weird show of intelligence Gavin didn’t argue. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not incredibly happy with this chapter, but it was important for future chapters. Thank you to everyone for the lovely support though, and I promise the next chapter will be better! (:


	6. In Which The Storm Hits

**Day Three**

Michael woke to the sound of rain slamming against his window and Gavin calling his name very quietly from his doorway. He looked at the clock next to bed and was about to murder Gavin for waking him up at two in the fucking morning when he got a good look at him. Gavin looked genuinely terrified. He was clinging to the doorframe, only half of his torso visible and his eyes wide, constantly moving to stare apprehensively at the closed window. He was shaking so badly that Michael could see it from where he was sitting.

“Gavin, are you okay?” He asked cautiously, throwing off his covers as he sat up.

Gavin shook his head. “I’m scared, Michael.”

Out of instinct, Michael stood and moved quickly over to him and pulled his shaking frame into his arms. He rubbed his hands softly over Gavin’s back, soothing him as best as he could. He didn’t think of what he was doing, who he was doing it with, or why he immediately thought to do it. “Don’t be,” He said, instead.

Slowly, Michael stepped them backwards so they could sit down on the bed, but shortly after they both sat down, a fallen tree branch slammed against Michael’s window. Gavin let out a scream and buried his face farther into Michael’s chest, his hands tightly holding onto his t-shirt. He began to shake harder, which Michael hadn’t thought was possible.

“Hey, it’s okay,” He said, trying to calm him in some way even as a blush rose at the feel of Gavin so close and personal, “It was just a branch.”

“I’m scared.” Gavin repeated. His voice was muffled by Michael’s shirt, but even so it was easy to hear how it quivered.

“It’ll be okay, Gavvers,” Michael assured, “We’re safe in here, okay?”

“Yeah, it’s why my house is on stilts, idiot.”

“Michael.” Gavin whined.

“Well, what’d you think; that it was some sort of style choice?”

“You’re a bully, Michael.” Gavin pouted, but there was the hint of a smile in his voice.

“Maybe, but it’s making you smile.” Gavin lifted his head away from his chest long enough to stick his tongue out in retaliation before more debris was thrown against the window, causing him to whimper and recede back into Michael. It continued like that for a while, them sitting quietly for a bit before something spooked Gavin. Eventually, Michael tugged him back until they were sitting with their backs against his headboard. It was much more comfortable, though Gavin quickly curled up into a ball against his chest.

“I don’t get it,” Michael was absentmindedly rubbing his back. Apparently it was soothing him a bit as he had stopped jumping at every tiny noise and his shaking had gotten less intense. “Isn’t England kind of famous for their shitty all-year rain?”

Gavin nodded against his chest, “But we don’t have a lot of _storms_. It’s just rain; there’s no thunder, no lightening, and definitely no strong winds ripping down trees and throwing them against our windows.”

“Why didn’t you say something yesterday when we found out this was going to happen?” Michael asked, though it made more sense as to why Gavin had been freaking out so much about them having enough supplies. Jesus, this was probably the guy’s worst nightmare.

“I didn’t want you to think I was pathetic.” Gavin said quietly. “More so than you already do, I guess.”

Michael sighed. “Gavin, I don’t think you’re pathetic. And there’s no way I would think you’re pathetic for being afraid of storms, especially one like this.”

“You’re always telling me how stupid and useless I am.”

“I do that with everyone. Actually, if I don’t insult you at least a little bit, I probably don’t like you very much.”

“That makes no sense, Michael.”

“I know.” They fell into a silence, and Michael found himself drifting off into sleep despite how he tried to stay awake. The storm hadn’t even showed signs of slowing down or stopping, though, and it was likely Gavin wouldn’t be too eager to go back to bed.

Sure enough, Gavin quietly spoke up again, “Michael?”

“Yeah?”

“I…” Gavin paused, “I know it’s a stupid request, but could I stay in here tonight? I can sleep on the floor if you want I just—I just don’t want to be by myself.”

“Yeah, sure.” Gavin moved to get up, but Michael held him where he was. “Don’t be stupid Gavin. It’s a queen bed, you can fucking sleep here.”

They both laid down, leaving a safe two inches between them. Again, Michael had almost fallen asleep when Gavin spoke. “Hey Michael?”

“Yeah, Gavin?”

“Thanks.”

Michael smiled to himself, but didn’t bother responding.

* * *

Michael woke up later than he had in years at half past nine when he felt hair tickling at his nose. A glance at his chest confirmed that Gavin had, indeed, flung himself over Michael in the middle of the night. The storm hadn’t seemed to have let up at all during the night, instead it seemed to worsen. Even in his sleep, Gavin tensed whenever something hit the window or thunder boomed. Michael felt like he should move, put space between them, maybe get up and let him sleep. But then Gavin would tense and press himself closer, and Michael didn’t have the heart to leave him alone.

He actually looked peaceful when he slept, not even snoring. Before he could even think about what he was doing, he had moved a hand to Gavin’s hair, which had only managed to get messier and wilder during the night. He froze in the process of moving it out of his face. _What the fuck am I doing?_ Michael thought, genuinely horrified as he realized how fucking gay everything about the situation was. When, exactly, did he even start tolerating Gavin, never mind being comfortable enough to let the guy fucking _sleep_ on him?

Michael genuinely didn’t understand what the fuck he was doing, and the more he thought about it the more his own actions confused him. So he did what he usually did and pushed down all the fucked up things he felt and got out before it got complicated. Though getting out from under Gavin was a struggle in itself; the guy could really cling when he wanted to, and he apparently slept like a motherfucking rock.

Michael chose to delay making breakfast for a while longer, instead just brewing enough coffee for the both of them, glad to find the power still fully functioning. Gavin eventually stumbled out of bed at ten thirty, rubbing tiredly at his eyes as he stumbled into the kitchen. If he felt weird about the night before, he wasn’t showing it. “Morning, Michael.”

“Look who finally decided to wake up.”

Gavin stuck his tongue out and moved to get his coffee before settling down next to Michael at the kitchen table. Michael noticed that he seemed calmer during the day for whatever reason, though he would still jump if something hit the window. “Thanks for last night.”

Michael froze, his mug half way to his lips. He swallowed around the lump that had risen in his throat, “Eh, it was no problem.”

“Do you know how many days the storm is supposed to last for?” Gavin asked, biting at his lip.

“The news said it’s probably going to be like this for a day or two, then it’ll calm down. But they think the rain will keep up for the rest of the week, so I hope you like surfing in that.”

“Won’t it be dangerous?”

“Nah, it’ll just be kind of gross out.” Michael saw the hesitation in Gavin’s eyes, “Seriously, Gavvers, I wouldn’t let you surf it if I didn’t think it was safe.”

“Okay.” Gavin said, though he still sounded unsure and nervous. “Michael?”

“Yes, Gavin?”

“Could I…” He paused, biting his lip, “I mean, I don’t want to sound weird but could I stay with you if it’s like this again tonight?” His face flushed and he rushed to explain himself, “It was easier to sleep with you. There, I mean. With me.”

“Sure, whatever.”

“Thanks, Michael.”

* * *

They spent the rest of the day playing videogames, periodically checking the news as they warned that a power outage was likely. Ironically, the power did cut out around three, right in the middle of their broadcast. Gavin let out an annoyingly loud screech and dropped the glass he was holding. By sheer luck the glass didn’t actually smash, though half of a perfectly good beer ended up all over Michael’s living room floor. Geoff called just as Gavin was finishing cleaning it up, much to Michael’s surprise.

 _“Hey, how’s it going?”_ He asked.

“We’re fine.” Gavin jumped at an especially loud boom of thunder, “Well I’m fine. Gavin’s freaking the fuck out.”

“Michael!” He whined, pouting and clutching at a pillow as he pulled his knees to his chest.

“Shut up, it’s true.”

_“How’s the water level out there?”_

“Not too bad, most of the beach is gone but it hasn’t hit the grass yet.” He explained, “I’ll probably go grab the boards in a couple minutes, though. Just to be safe. How’re things out there?”

_“Not bad, Griffon was worried that Millie would freak out, but she’s one badass little girl and is fucking loving it.”_

Michael couldn’t help but smile, Millie was the best. “Good, keep us updated.”

 _“Yeah, you too.”_ Geoff said, _“Have fun with Gavin, by the way.”_

“Fuck you,” Michael said, but the line had already gone dead.

“I’ve got to go grab the boards,” He made his way to his back door, hoping that less rain would get in since the wind was blowing off-shore for once. “I’ll be back in a couple minutes. Can you open the door for me?”

“Michael, you can’t go out there!”

“I’ll be fine, Gavin.”

Gavin moved in front of the door, arms spread wide like he was defending some tree from a bulldozer or something, “No, it’s too dangerous!”

“Look, I either go out there like I have many times since I moved here, or your board ends up in the ocean and you’re a good couple _thousand_ dollars in debt to me for the boards _I_ will have to lose.”

Gavin frowned deeply, clearly unhappy, but stepped aside and let him past. Michael jogged quickly down the stairs and to where the boards were under his house, grabbing the three boards and stuffing them under his arms before jogging back up to the kitchen door. By the time he had put them in the spare room that Gavin would apparently not be using, he was drenched and dripping all over the place.

“Thank god it’s still fucking hot here,” was all Michael said after changing into dry clothes and joining Gavin on the couch in the living room.

* * *

Dinner consisted of peanut butter and jam sandwiches because Michael was too lazy to make anything else. He turned on the few battery powered lamps he had and they ate on the floor of the living room, a half-played game of _Monopoly_ set out before them.

“You’re a fucking cheater!” Michael screamed for the sixth time in the game.

“I am not, I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

“You just took money from the bank!” He shouted, pointing at Gavin, who still held the $500 bill in his right hand.

“It’s my pay check, I’m the banker!”

“That isn’t how it fucking works, dipshit!”

“That’s how Dan and I always played it,” Gavin pouted, putting the bill back in its place. Michael felt another stab of anger at the mention of him, though he couldn’t understand why.

“Fine, whatever, I don’t fucking care. But I want $100 in rent because fuck you, that’s why.”

Gavin narrowed his eyes, but grabbed the 500 for himself and the 100 for Michael. The game after that went surprisingly well. Gavin pulled a few more rules out of his ass, which Michael vetoed, and he ended up getting his ass kicked regardless. Out of boredom more than tiredness, they both decided to head to bed at nine. It was awkward for a moment as Gavin shuffled his feet next to Michael’s room in his baggy PJ’s before Michael told him to just get in the fucking room.

They settled into bed with a few inches between them, though Michael had a feeling he’d wake up to the same thing as the morning before.

 


	7. In Which We Learn About Michael and Gavin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the wait on this one, guys. I didn’t quite know where I wanted to go with this chapter, but I think I’m happy with it overall. Important note, please read: So I’m sure most of you know that I’m in Hawaii right now (and have been for the past three weeks—I started this on the plane lol). Well, tomorrow is our last day on the Big Island, so this story is going to be going on a very short hiatus. I will aim to update it on the 11th, since I get back to my house on the 9th (I want to give myself a few days to settle back in). Thanks again for all of your support, and I’ll see you on the 11th!

  **Day Five**

Much to his surprise, when Michael woke up the next morning Gavin was already awake and sitting on the chair in his room with one of his (admittedly many) surfing books. “Good morning,” Gavin said, glancing up and noticing that he was awake.

                “Morning,” Michael climbed out of bed, walking over to his window so he could access their situation. It was still raining. A lot. And judging by the way the trees were nearly bent in half, it was pretty fucking windy, too. “How long have you been up?”

Gavin shrugged, “The storm got pretty bad around four, and I’ve been up since then.”

“Four?” Michael shook his head in disbelief, “Gavin, we’ve gotta find a way for you to get over this.”

“And how would you suppose we do that?”

Michael gritted his teeth, seriously not appreciating the sarcasm. He was trying to help, and Gavin just had to be a dick. “I don’t fucking know, but if you’re planning on living on this island it’s going to be pretty fucking difficult if you can’t handle a goddamn storm.”

“I just don’t like them, okay?” Gavin all but shouted.

Michael sighed, rubbing his face and struggling to control his anger. “Look, I just want to help. I’m not going to laugh at you for telling me why they freak you, okay?”

For a moment, Gavin looked like he was going to say something, but then he shook his head and simply ran from the room. Michael was ready to fucking strangle him for being such a stubborn dickhead, but he forced himself to stay calm and instead go and make something for breakfast. Unfortunately for him, the power was still out, and he was more or less limited to fruit and cereal with warm milk. And no coffee, which was just fucking fantastic. It wasn’t until a loud _boom_ filled the house, quickly followed by a flash, that he realized the thunder and lightning had previously subsided. Michael knew that Gavin was probably freaking out somewhere—if it had caught _him_ by surprise, he couldn’t imagine what it did to the Brit—so he put his cereal bowl in the sink and started moving through the house in search of him.

Michael found him back in his room. Not the room that he had given Gavin to use, no, but _his_ room. He was sitting on the floor, his back pressed against the bed, and was hugging his knees tightly to his chest. “Gavin?” Michael asked softly, but he still jumped at the noise. Michael moved over to sit beside him. “Ready to talk now?”

“I just… I don’t like the noises, Michael.” Gavin said quietly, “I don’t like loud noises.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know.”

“C’mon, Gavin. Don’t lie to me.”

Gavin stared pointedly at the floor. “I guess it’s ‘cause when I was in school the other guys liked to bully me by slamming me into lockers.” His frown depended at the memories, “The bang of my shoulder or head hitting the lockers was so loud, Michael, and then after all I would feel is pain.”

Michael’s immediate reaction was that he really wanted to slam those motherfuckers into a few lockers. Or down a cliff, either one. “They’re fucking idiots. Why the fuck were they throwing you into lockers?”

“Because I’m the idiot, Michael.” Gavin said seriously, “Not them. I always say stupid stuff.”

“Fuck that, no you don’t.”

“I do.”

“Shut up, no.” Michael sighed heavily, “You’re not an idiot, okay. I mean, you say stupid stuff, yeah, but usually you’re actually making a decent point.”

“Yeah right.”

“Gavin, I’m serious.” He said.

“Thanks, Michael. I think you’re the first person to think that.”

* * *

The storm finally showed sights of slowing down at six o’clock. The rain and wind had lessened, and the thunder and lightning had long since stopped. Michael was just glad it was over and he could get back to training in the morning. He felt bad that Gavin had lost out on their “mentoring” days because of it, too. Poor guy was going to have to fucking haul ass to be ready in time for the comp. at this point.

He was also glad for Gavin’s sake that it was over because he had lost so much fucking sleep and had spent most of the past two days cowering in various states of fear and panic. “Ready for training tomorrow?” Michael asked nonchalantly as they played poker and he kicked Gavin’s ass. (Since the power was still out which Michael was not fucking pleased about.)

“What?” The panic was back in his voice, “But the storm, Michael!”

“Relax, it’ll be gone by tomorrow morning.” He glanced to the window, “We’ll probably have to clean up the beach a bit, but I think we can manage to get that done by the afternoon.”

“Are you sure?”

“Gavin, I wouldn’t let you go out there if it wasn’t safe, alright? Jesus.”

“Okay.”

“Okay.” They fell silent again, Michael continuing to pummel him in their game. He couldn’t help but notice how natural it felt to have Gavin there now. At the beginning of the week, he hadn’t even wanted to meet the guy, and now they were fucking cuddling at night. Basically, it was kind of fucking confusing and Michael didn’t like thinking about it too much.

“Michael?”

“Yeah?”

“Do I have a chance?”

“No, you’re fucking awful at this game, fucking Christ.”

Gavin chuckle, but there was no life to it, “I mean in the competition in two weeks. Is there any way I’ll even have a chance at qualifying?”

“Not if you’re thinking like that.” Michael sighed and put his cards down, “You’re fucking good, okay? As long as you listen to Geoff and learn the technical shit, you’re a shoe in.”

“But—”

“No, it’s fucking true. Most of the idiots that we’re going to compete against are just in it for the money and the fame. They lack passion. It’s not fun for them anymore, y’know? And that’s obvious when they surf.”

“Oh.”

“But you’ve got that. You do it ‘cause you enjoy it, and that’s good.”

“So do you,” Gavin said quickly, “You’re amazing, Michael.”

“Yeah, well, you don’t want to be like me.”

“Why not?”

“Look at how I live, Gav. You don’t want this.”

“I don’t think I understand.”

“My life is surfing, Gavin. That’s it. Nothing else, _no one_ else.” He sighed, “My only friend is my coach, and the only good relationship I had fell apart because I couldn’t leave surfing behind long enough to be there for her.”

“You have Ray!”

Michael shrugged, “I guess, if you’d call it a friendship. Both of us more or less mind our own business unless we’re at events and shit.”

“Well… I’m your friend, Michael.” He said sternly. “Right?”

For a minute he thought about saying they weren’t. Because he had been adamant about not being his friend. But at the same time, Michael knew that Gavin was probably one of the best friends he’d ever had, so he simply said, “Yeah, you are.”


	8. In Which There is Improvement

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the longer-than-planned hiatus (yay car problems.), but I'm going to be hopefully returning to my old update schedule of every 2-3 days. Thanks for the support, again. I love hearing from you all, it keeps me writing. (:

**Day Six**

Gavin was not pleased that he had to get up at 5:30 in the morning, even if Michael had reminded him that that was, technically, sleeping in. He felt a bit bad, seeing as Gavin hadn’t been getting much sleep during their impromptu ‘vacation’, but he also realized that they had two days left in their ‘mentorship’ and he wanted to actually try and help a little bit. As it was, Gavin was going to have to haul ass to be ready in time.

“Plus, we still have to clean up the beach before we can even _do_ anything,” Michael reminded as he watched Gavin topple his way out of Michael’s bed, dragging himself in the direction of his own bedroom.

“How bad could it possibly be, Michael?” He whined, but when they finally got out there (a half hour later, much to Michael’s annoyance) Gavin shut up pretty quick. There were fallen branches and coconuts everywhere, along with trash and, apparently, some idiot’s beach chairs. Michael assigned Gavin to gathering up the leaves and branches and piling them in his fire pit while he collected all the coconuts off the ground. He knew a local artist, Barbara, who made them into coconut postcards and whenever he brought her some, she would make him cookies. And who the fuck would turn down free cookies?

They didn’t actually finis cleaning up until quarter to four, which Michael was less than happy about. “What are we doing today?” Gavin asked cheerily, obviously much happier to be back in the water than he had been that morning.

“I dunno. Why don’t we go over some tricks.”

“That sounds great, Michael!” Gavin said enthusiastically.

“Alright, I’ll give you a trick, you go do it, and I’ll tell you if it was shit.” He racked his brain for an easy move to start, one that Gavin couldn’t mess up. “Let’s start with a 180, and then a 360.” 

Turns out Gavin could do it, but he was all over the place as he did. Especially with the 360. “Gavin, c’mon!” Michael shouted as he paddled back, “You’re supposed to have _balance_ ,why the fuck were you flailing all over the place?”

“It’s slippery, Michael!”

“No shit, it’s fucking _water_ idiot!”

“I’m sorry!”

Michael sighed, “Whatever, just go do it again. Widen your stance this time.” Gavin did as told and, sure enough, did the trick a lot better. Though he still wasn’t fantastic. “Well that was better, sort of.”

“I didn’t fall!”

“You didn’t fall the first time, either.”

Gavin frowned, “Yeah, but I didn’t _feel_ like I was going to fall this time!”

“Great. I’m going to give you a series of moves this time, you’ve gotta follow it exactly, alright? I’m going to give you good sets to get easy points from the judges, as long as their done right.” Gavin nodded, but Michael wasn’t sure he’d even remember the order by the time he got out there. “Great. So start off with a bottom turn, then do some carving, then cutback, kick flip, and finally make sure to kick out.”

As expected, Gavin looked almost horrified. But he didn’t argue and immediately started paddling out. Michael watched as he completed the moves, forgetting to carve and bailing instead of kicking out. Regardless, he looked pleased when he came back, and it made Michael smile. He reminded himself that, despite his talent, Gavin was still a complete newbie. “That was pretty good.”

“I forgot stuff, though.”

“Yeah, but at least you did most of it well.”

“I didn’t even fall on the kick flip!”

Michael snorted, “No, you didn’t.”

“What next, Michael?”

“Do you know how to shove your board?”

“I think so?”

“It’s when you shove your board around under your feet, either a 180 or a 360.”

“Right!”

“Good, okay, so I want you to do that, a switch stance, a tailslide, switch to frontside, and try and try to ride the pipe. I don’t really give a shit which order, you find one that you think will work.” Michael watched him eagerly start paddling out, “Don’t get caught in the pipe!” He shouted for good measure.”

“Hey, Michael!” He turned to the beach to see Ray standing and flailing, “I’ve been knocking for hours, you dick!”

“Sorry,” Michael called back, just as Gavin started screeching at him to get his attention, “Michael, Michael, the wave is here; you need to watch now!”

Michael groaned, “Just give me a sec, Ray. Or better yet, get your ass in the water and be fucking useful.” He turned to watch Gavin, pleased to see him perform the moves, though he looked like he was still working off his raw talent over actual skill.

“He’s not bad,” Ray pointed out as they waited for him to come back, “I mean, for someone who’s only competed once? He could be some serious competition.”

“Yeah, maybe. If he _stops dicking around_ ,” Michael rose his voice just loud enough that he knew Gavin would hear, “He needs to focus on the technical side, y’know?”

“He could probably still beat out half of the people who show up every year.”

“I know, just don’t tell him that. We don’t need his head getting any bigger than it already is.”

* * *

Ray ended up being more help than Michael was expecting, and he managed to hold his patience a lot longer than Michael would’ve been able to. By the end of their three hour training session, Gavin had improved enough that it was clear to everyone he would be ready in time, as long as he kept it up. Surprisingly, Ray decided to stay for dinner, and it was decided that Michael would barbeque steaks. Because he was the only one who could fucking cook.

“You guys fucking suck,” He said as he was shoved outside with a plateful of raw meat, “You better not burn the fucking potatoes!” He shouted just as the door slammed.

Thankfully for them, they didn’t.

“These are great, Michael,” Gavin said cheerfully through a mouthful of food. “You’re such a good cook.”

Ray nodded, “Agreed.”

“Maybe if you assholes would learn to cook you could make your own goddamn food.”

“Why would we do that?” Gavin asked.

“Yeah, if we don’t learn how people like you will make us food.”

“Ray, you live alone.”

He shrugged, “I find ways, Michael.”

“Are you taking advantage of Joel again?”

“It’s not taking advantage of someone if they’re willing,” Ray shrugged. “And last time I checked, he was showing up at _my_ doorstep complaining about how scrawny I am.”

“That is a bloody brilliant set up,” Gavin said.

“No it’s not, he only does it ‘cause he feels responsible for him.” Michael said, “Like Geoff, with you.”

“Geoff is the best cook,” He commented with a reminiscent smile, quickly tacking on a, “No offense, Michael.”

“Whatever, you two suck.”

“We’re top.”

“I don’t know what that means, but agreed.”

* * *

Geoff called at nine. Gavin was half-way to shitfaced on the couch, and Ray was acting like he was, despite not drinking anything. So naturally, as their apparent babysitter, Michael got the phone. “What?”

“You know most people answer with a friendly ‘hello’, right?”

“Fuck off, what do you want?”

“Is Gavin there?”

“He’s drunk off his ass right now.”

“Of course he is,” Geoff sighed, “Well there was a change of plans. I can come get him tomorrow.”

Michael’s stomach dropped and he suddenly felt like he was going to puke. “Oh?”

Geoff was quiet for a moment. “Unless you want him to stay?”

“What?” Did he want Gavin to stay? Yeah, he did. Michael wasn’t going to lie to himself. He liked having the idiot around. But that wasn’t his plan. Gavin was supposed to come for a week, and then that would be it. Michael would get back to his training and they’d only have to see each other at his dinners. End of story. So he ignored the voice screaming in his head telling him to say he did. “No, of course not. He’s a pain in the ass.”

Geoff sighed. “Alright, I’ll be there at noon. Make sure he’s got all his shit packed up by then.”

“Right.”

“And Michael?”

“What?”

“Don’t be a dick.”


	9. In Which Michael Notices Some Things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize profusely for misspelling Lindsay’s name in the previous 1 or 2 chapters. I have a friend with the Lindsey spelling, and I always forget which is which!

**Day Seven**

                “Michael,” Gavin groaned, squinting at the light that had just been turned on, “Michael, I know that training is important and all, but I’m hungover, and it hurts. Can’t training wait another hour?”

“We’re not training today.”

“No? Really?” Gavin sounded excited, and it made Michael cringe. “What are we doing instead?”

“We’re packing.”

Gavin’s face fell immediately. “What?”

“Geoff’s coming to pick you up at noon.” Michael replied, but he couldn’t look at him anymore. Not as all the excitement left him and was replaced with defeated confusion.

“N-no…” He shook his head, “No, he wasn’t supposed to come until tomorrow.”

“He called yesterday. He’s got a room ready for you today.”

“But…”

“C’mon, we gotta get started now if we want to finish in time.” Michael tried to keep his tone even, unaffected. He tried to pretend that everything was normal and he wasn’t doing anything wrong. The look on Gavin’s face wasn’t one he would easily forget, however. “I’ll go get us coffee and toast or some shit.”

Michael found Ray draped over his couch. He sighed, wondering briefly why the fuck Ray had stayed when he hadn’t drunk anything before realizing that Joel had probably dropped him off and fallen asleep waiting for the call to come pick him up. Poor bastard was whipped. “Ray,” Michael said, nudging his shoulder, “Get the fuck up, you lazy ass.”

Ray squinted up at him, his glasses half-way off his face, “Dude, the hell? It’s like 6 in the morning.”

“Yeah, well, Gavin and I have shit to do, so either get up and help or go home and sleep.”

“Surfing lessons again?” Ray pushed himself up, rubbing at his eyes and fixing his glasses, “I can help with that.”

“No, we’re packing.”

“What? I thought he was supposed to be here for a week?”

Michael shrugged, “Geoff finished his room early. He said he could come pick him up today.” Ray continued to stare at him, giving him that _look_ that he always did when he was disappointed in him. “What?”

“I thought he could stay here if you wanted him to.”

“Yeah, and?”

“Why’s he leaving?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, why are you letting Geoff take him?” Ray asked, as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Because he’s your _friend_? Because he’s probably one of the first people you’ve gotten along with this well since _Lindsay_? Because, fuck Michael, you might even like him _more_ than just in that sense?”

“What?” Michael spat, “Don’t be fucking ridiculous. I don’t like him. In _any_ sense of the word.”

“Michael.” Ray warned, but he ignored it.

“No, seriously. He’s a fucking idiot. He doesn’t do shit for himself. This week has been _painful_.”

“ _Michael!”_ Ray hissed, “Shut the _fuck_ up!”

“Why?”

“Because you’re fucking loud and Gavin is going to hear you.” He stood up, “I don’t care if you want to be a dick, but I’m not going to sit here and let you ruin his chances at the competition because you can’t stop fucking _pushing people away._ Jesus.”

Michael gaped at him, “I don’t—I mean, that wasn’t what I…” He sputtered.

“Yeah, whatever. I’m going to go help Gavin pack. Why don’t you just go do some shit on your own?”

“Fine, whatever.”

* * *

When Michael returned home at noon, Gavin was already gone. No note, no phone call, nothing. Just gone. It wasn’t until Michael was making dinner that he realized he missed Gavin dicking around next to him, attempting to help but only making it worse. His house was oddly quiet; oddly calm. He didn’t expect to _miss_ Gavin’s stupidity, but he couldn’t deny the inevitable fact that he did. It was boring without him, and left to his own Michael was forced to let Ray’s words resonate.

He tried to convince himself that he didn’t push people away, but the more he tried to come up with reasons that Ray was wrong, the more he was only left with reasons he was right. Lindsay was obviously the best example. She was perfect, she swore and got his humor, she loved surfing and video games, and she never once let him get away with thinking he was the shit. He would tell people that he let her slip away, that she left because she could do better, but the reality was far different from what he wanted others to believe.

Lindsay hadn’t left. She had been patient, she didn’t get mad when he forgot about a date because training ran late, or had to cancel because something came up.  She stayed with him, she stayed supportive, and he pushed her away. He pushed her away because he thought she deserved better than him, which she almost certainly did, but he mostly did it out of fear. Michael didn’t want to fall any harder for her only to have his lifestyle push her away. So he broke it off before she had the chance.

After that point he just stopped letting people get close. Geoff, Ray… he kept them at a distance so they wouldn’t have the chance to hurt him, or he them. Then Gavin Free sauntered into his life and everything flipped upside down. Gavin didn’t _let_ him keep him out, he forced himself in and made sure he would stay there. He put his emotions on the table, and left them there for Michael to use, abuse, or cherish, and Michael let him get close. Once again, he let himself get scared, and once again he pushed Gavin away.

Did his feelings extend past friendship? Probably. But Michael couldn’t _let_ them. He _wouldn’t_ let them. Gavin was his competition; just some annoying prick he had to spend a week with. It couldn’t extend past that.

Even if Gavin made Michael feel like he was more than surfing. That out of the water, he was still important. It was something he had long since stopped believing was possible. Still, he couldn’t let himself feel anything for Gavin, and _those_ kinds of feelings were especially off-limits.

Michael shook his head, forcing himself out of his thoughts. It would be fine. They would see each other in two weeks’ time at the competition, they’d be pleasant, Gavin would probably kick some ass, and that’d be that.

So even though his gut told him it was wrong to leave it how he did, Michael simply went to bed. 


	10. In Which Michael Is An Asshole

**Two Weeks Later**

Michael didn’t see Gavin again until the day of the competition. He thought the British boy was maybe mad at him, but when he arrived at the beach Gavin came bouncing over, just as chipper as ever, and threw himself into Michael’s arms. “Hi, Michael!”

“Um, hi,” Michael replied, hands hovering in the air behind Gavin’s back awkwardly.

“I take back _everything_ I said about your training,” He pulled away, eyes filled with cartoonish horror, “Geoff is _so much worse_ , Michael. I thought I was going to die!”

“You’re a big baby,” Geoff called from farther down the beach, “A big baby who _should_ be waxing his board right now!”

Gavin leaned in close, whispering loudly in Michael’s ear, “Save me, Michael. He’s going to kill me.”

“I’m sure you’ll be okay.”

“Gavin, now!” Geoff demanded, angrier this time.

“Coming!” Gavin started stumbling back down the beach to where he was impatiently waiting, “Good luck today, Michael!”

“Yeah… you too.” Michael moved over to the other side of the beach, struggling to ignore the guilt rising in his throat. He busied himself with preparing his own board and blocking out the growing crowd of people. When he glanced over at the direction of Gavin, he saw him throwing his arms around a taller dark-haired guy. Michael felt his anger flare, though he didn’t want to think about why. He clenched his fists, watching as Gavin’s face lit up like it did when Michael had taken him to his special place, and all this guy had to do was be there.

Before Michael could think about it, he was moving back across the beach. Gavin didn’t even glance his way as he approached, which was surprisingly off-putting for him. Instead it was the tall guy who acknowledged him. “Friend of yours, B?”

“Huh?” Gavin looked over, “Oh, yes! This is Michael!”

The guy smiled, “Ah, Michael.” He said in his stupid British accent, “I’ve heard so much about you.”

“Can’t say the same.”

“This is Dan, Michael!” Gavin said happily, “He came all the way from England!”

Michael raised an eyebrow, “Is that so?”

“Yeah, well, it’s his first big competition. I couldn’t miss this.”

“Huh.”

“Not that I doubt he’s going to win.”

Gavin laughed, “He says that now.”

Michael watched as they interacted, watched the shimmer in Gavin’s eye and the protectiveness in Dan’s. He thought back to all the times that he had seen that shimmer and selfishly thought it was directed at him, only now realizing that he was being stupid. That every time he saw that look, it would be closely followed by Gavin saying ‘I have to send a picture to Dan!’. Michael felt stupid for thinking it was anything else.

“Wow, we having a party over here or something?” Ray asked, voice loud and directly next to him, making Michael jump.

“Hi Ray!”

“Who’s this guy?”

“This is Dan!” Gavin went into explaining who he was, that they had been friends for years. That Dan had been his partner in slow motion filming, and also the one behind the camera in the video that got him discovered. Michael just couldn’t stand there and listen to him gush anymore. He didn’t want to hear the inevitable slip that let him know that Dan was a lot more than just his best friend. He needed to keep a steady head. So he walked back to his board and ignored Gavin’s calls for him.

* * *

As soon as the competition started and Michael got into the water, he felt himself calm. As he padded out on his board he felt all the troubling thoughts just… flow into the ocean bellow him. He rain his hands across the currently calm water and waited for the air horn to blow, and the competition to start.

“Hey, isn’t that the British idiot who Geoff decided to take on?” Michael frowned, but tried to ignore them. Tried to keep not caring.

“Yeah, fucking pathetic though, isn’t he?” Another voice asked, definitely louder. “Does he seriously think he’ll be able to beat us?”

“Hah, if he does he’s fucking dreaming.” Michael looked at the two guys next to him, then out across the water in search of Gavin. He found him not too far to his left, next to Ray. He could tell that Gavin was upset (and trying to hide it, but doing a rather awful job), and he could see that Ray was pissed off.

“Hey, how about you shut the fuck up?” Ray said back, “You think you’re better than him? Why don’t you just prove it?”

“Oh, we plan to.” They laughed, “Just like we plan on kicking your ass, yet again.”

Ray shook his head in disgust, but chose not reply. He looked over to Michael, and the disappointment in his eyes was evident. Michael refused to feel bad, and he wasn’t about to start a big problem. He was known for not giving a shit. He wasn’t going to change that now.

The air horn finally went, and immediately everyone was off. Michael knew better than to go for the first wave, but he paddled out anyway to avoid a bunch of people trying to copy him. And, sure enough, the first few waves were a clusterfuck of people trying to steal waves, wipeouts, and shitty runs. He felt proud to see Gavin stay behind, glad that he had retained some of the hints Michael had given him.

Because of that, he wasn’t really surprised to see Gavin go for the same wave as him. He did, however, feel a stab of guilt when he beat him out. He could almost _feel_ Gavin’s disappointment, but he didn’t let it affect him, he _couldn’t_. Instead, Michael surfed like he would’ve if he had beat out any of the other competitors.

The rest of the heat went similarly, with Gavin getting beat out and struck down, his waved being stolen by the idiots who were judging him before. He couldn’t help but feel proud when Gavin finally got a wave, and he followed the exact run that Michael had suggested what felt like ages ago. He did it almost perfectly, and Michael half expected that to shut everyone up, but instead it only got worse.

By the end of the competition, it seemed as if Gavin only barely skimmed his way into the top four. He would advance along with Ray, who got third, but just barely. Michael, on the other hand, got first. As usual. Except it didn’t feel like it usually did; he didn’t get the satisfaction, the pride. The joy that he’d started to find only in the water had all but disappeared.

He waited until everyone else had gotten out of the water before paddling back to shore himself. He didn’t move over to Geoff, like usual, he didn’t even go grab the trophy like he was supposed to. Instead, he moved to the far right of the beach, away from the crowds and the paparazzi. He was sure he’d get hell for it later, but Michael honestly just wasn’t in the mood to deal with people. He was tempted to go straight home, he probably _should’ve_ went home, but he just couldn’t bring himself to leave.

Michael couldn’t stop the guilt that sat heavily in the pit of his stomach. He should’ve done something, he should’ve defended Gavin. But he couldn’t. He was Michael Jones. He didn’t get attached to people, he didn’t care about getting fucked over. Out of the water, he was nothing. He wasn’t important, he wasn’t caring, he wasn’t… He wasn’t like Gavin.

“What the _fuck_ was that?” Ray shouted, storming over. He was potentially the angriest Michael had ever honestly seen him.

“What?”

“What do you think? Gavin!”

“He’s not my responsibility. He should learn to take care of himself.”

“Seriously? You’ve got to be fucking _joking_ , right?” Ray shook his head in disgust. “If one of your _friends_ is being harassed by a bunch of snakes, you fucking _do_ something.”

“He’s not my friend,” Michael lied, looking away. “He was just some fucktard I had to babysit for a week.”

Ray looked absolutely disgusted, but Michael stopped caring as his eye caught Gavin’s over Ray’s shoulder. Before he could even think to say something, Gavin was running off in the other direction; back to Geoff and Dan. As soon as he reached them, Dan was pulling him into his arms, rubbing Gavin’s back comfortingly and shooting glares in Michael’s direction. Michael clenched his jaw, turning away from them and fighting the temptation to go and punch Dan in the face.

“Yeah,” Ray scoffed, “You don’t give a shit about him. Not at all. Congratulations on your win, asshole.”

Ray stormed away, and Michael was left by himself. Like he usually was, like he should be. This was why he didn’t get attached to people. He always fucked up, he always hurt them, and he _knew_ they’d be better to just forget about him. He had his board and his island. That would be enough for him. It had been enough for him since Geoff decided to take him on, and it he thought it would always be enough.

So why Gavin had to stumble into his life and fuck everything up, Michael didn’t know. Why one annoying asshole would make such a huge fucking difference, he would never know. All he knew was that he yet again let go of something good, some _one_ good. He took it and twisted it until he convinced himself it was bad and wrong, and yet again he let go of someone who could’ve made his life better, happier. Someone who could’ve made him _live_ instead of just exist. Then again, he was Michael Jones. And Michael Jones could be a fucking idiot sometimes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to everyone for the support. You're all lovely and you make my days! (:


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... remember when I posted to AO3? Me neither. I decided to fix that, and therefore anyone who still follows me on here is about to get the biggest fic-dump ever.   
> For those who were wondering, I've been posting everything to Tumblr, which I have a link to on my page. But I promise I'll try and upload here again. Sorry guys ):

Michael spent days after the competition slowly rotting on his couch. His training had halted completely, instead being replaced by copious amounts of  _Halo_. So when his front door slammed open, he threw his controller in shock and let out a shamefully girly scream. “Michael, what the  _fuck_  are you doing?” Lindsay shouted. It wasn’t playful like usual; her voice was just plain angry.

“I was playing Halo?” He half-questioned, more than a little confused.

Lindsay smacked his head, “Don’t be an idiot.”

“First off,  _ow._ ”  He hissed, rubbing at the back of his head, “But honestly I have no fucking clue what you’re talking about.”

“Look, you may be able to avoid Ray, even Geoff, but I  _know_  you Michael Jones, and I know that you’re talking bullshit.” She sighed, “Look at you! You’re sitting here having some sort of self-pity party instead of just admitting that you’ve fucked up.”

“That’s not—”

“No. It’s time you fucking grow a pair and realize that we’re not going to freak out if you have fucking _emotions_ , Michael. Man the fuck up.” She stormed back and forth in front of him, hands moving animatedly as she ranted. When she stopped and turned to him head-on, lowering her voice more pleading and sad then angry,  _that’s_  when Michael felt afraid. “For once in your life, don’t let the one you love go.”

“What?” He sputtered, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Lindsay sighed, “How many Gavin’s do you think there are in this world, Michael? You can’t just let someone like that go.”

“Lindsay…” She shook her head, her expression sad. “No, Michael. Just… For once, please be selfish. Let yourself be happy. If not for you, than for me.”

“Even if I tried, it’s too late,” Michael sighed, rubbing tiredly at his eyes, “Regardless of if he forgave me, he’s got Dan.”

“Does he, though?” Lindsay questioned, “Or is your jealousy blinding you?”

“You didn’t see them together, Linds.”

“Look, all I’m trying to say is that you’re either going to end up living a life of what-if’s, should-have’s and could-have’s. Or, you can take a chance for someone important to you.”

“And if it only makes it worse?” Michael asked, “If it just makes him hate me more?”

“Well then you’ll be able to move on. You’ll know that you tried, that you did everything in your power to make it right. After all, it’s better to have loved and lost than never have loved at all, right?”

“I’ve never really agreed with that saying.”

Lindsay sighed, “Well that’s all I’ve got to say. I hope that you can stop being an ass for long enough to make something good of all this.”

She walked out without another word, leaving Michael to sit in silence and think about everything she said. He couldn’t deny anymore that he had obtained… feelings for Gavin during their time together. They weren’t exactly  _wanted_ , and he definitely wouldn’t have  _chosen_  Gavin, but that’s what people always said, right? That the one person you can’t live without is almost always the one you least expect? They had to be right, because there he was; acting like a teenage girl for some British idiot.

Still, accepting it was pretty useless. Michael knew he still couldn’t do anything about it. In the slim chance that he  _wasn’t_  with Dan, Michael had fucked up. Whatever already tiny chance he had was pretty much gone, slipping through his fingers like sand. Normally, this would be where he would give up, move on. Just forget about him. Except for the first time in a long time, Michael didn’t  _want_  to give up. He wanted Gavin, and for once he was going to do everything in his power to get him. Gavin was worth it, Michael knew, even if he was an idiot.

So Michael did what he always did when he needed to be completely alone, needed to think without any distractions; he went to his place on the island.

* * *

Somehow Michael wasn’t as surprised as he should’ve been when he found someone already sitting on his rock. Maybe he was just too tired to care, or maybe his brain had realized it was Gavin before he could register it into a thought. When he finally did clue in, he was tempted to turn around and run—everything in him  _screamed_  for him to get away like usual, but this time Michael pushed his fears down and took that step forward.

“Gavin,” He said quietly. The person in question jumped and whipped around. He looked mad and disappointed, but the sadness in his eyes overtook everything.

“Right, this is your spot.” He stood up, storming quickly past him. “I’ll leave.”

“No, Gavin—” Michael grabbed his arm, “Please.”

“Please what?” He spat, “Please sit and listen to me make excuses so my reputation doesn’t get ruined. Fucking save it, I’m not going to say anything.”

He flinched at the coldness in his voice, but knew that it wasn’t uncalled for or untrue. “I just want to talk, Gavin.”

“Well I  _don’t_ , Michael.” He ripped his arm out of Michael’s grip, “Leave me alone.”

Michael watched him walk away, frozen. “I was scared!” He blurted out before he could fully process the thought, immediately feeling like an idiot. When Gavin paused, however, he couldn’t help but feel relieved.

“What?”

He sighed, “I was afraid of getting close to you; of getting close to  _anyone_.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know,” Michael threw his arms up, “Because I’m an idiot, because I fuck everything up all the time? As soon as I get close to someone I ruin them. So I stay away. That way no one gets hurt.”

“And since when is that your choice?” Gavin asked bitterly, “Since when do  _you_  get to decide if I want to risk that?”

“What?”

“It’s not up to you to decide if I want to risk getting hurt for you, Michael.  _I_  trusted you.” He shook his head, “I didn’t care that you were a jerk, I liked you. I liked being your friend, and maybe I was an idiot for thinking you liked it too, but I did.”

Michael shook his head sadly, looking down at the rock bellow them and feeling pathetic and exposed, “Of course I like you, you idiot.”

“Apparently not.”

“Look, I didn’t  _want_  to like you, okay? I wanted to get rid of you as quickly as possible, because I liked being alone.” Gavin frowned and moved to turn, so Michael raised his voice and quickly continued, “But then you came along and crawled your way into my life and now I don’t want to live in that house by myself. You’re an idiot, you make up stupid fucking words and you’re way too excited about everything, but  _fuck it._  I really fucking like that, alright?”

“Why should I believe you?”

“Do you really think I’d say that shit just because I’m worried about my reputation, Gavin? That’s probably the most honest I’ve been with  _anyone_.”

Gavin looked at him sceptically, “You really hurt me, Michael.”

“I know, and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said any of that shit. I should’ve punched those fuckers in the face I should’ve…” He sighed again, running a hand through his hair, “I’m sorry.”

“Buy me a couple drinks and maybe we’ll be okay.”

Michael laughed, wholeheartedly _laughed_. It felt as if something had been lifted off of his shoulders. “You’ve got a deal.”

“You could’ve said all that at the beach you know, you doughnut.” Gavin said as they walked back towards his car.

“Yeah, well, Lindsay had to come kick my ass first.” Michael threw back, “How’d you get out here, anyway?”

“Geoff dropped me off.”

“Do you want to call him and let him know that he doesn’t have to come pick you up?”

“Sure.” Gavin reached into his pocket, then his other pocket, and finally his two back pockets. His eyes got comically wide and Michael couldn’t help but laugh.

“You’re an idiot.”

“ _Mi-coool!_ ” Gavin whined in the familiar tone that let Michael know he was, indeed, forgiven.


	12. Chapter 12

When Michael brought Gavin home later that night, considerably more drunk and chipper than when they had left, Geoff demanded to speak to him. Griffon took Gavin by the shoulders, leading him off towards his room as he happily mumbled about their night. Michael thought he heard Dan’s name being mentioned, and he briefly wondered if he would be there waiting for Gavin in his room. He didn’t let it get to him, though, purposefully pushing it out of his mind and following Geoff out and onto the front lawn.

“I don’t know what you said to get him to forgive you, but I’m not about to let you off as easily.”

“I didn’t think you would,” Michael sighed.

“You were a dick, Michael. Not in the tolerable, joking way you usually are. You were just fucking awful.” He shook his head sadly, “Gavin trusted you; he  _cared_  about you, and to repay him you just fucking led him on and then fucked him over.”

“I didn’t lead him on, Geoff.”

“No?” He laughed bitterly, “Really, because last I checked making someone think they’re important to you and then turning around and telling someone else you don’t give a shit about them is doing just fucking that. You  _knew_  how much he cared, and you just kept fucking going.”

“I didn’t…” Michael shook his head quickly, eyebrows furrowing, “I didn’t  _want_  to hurt him.” He admitted honestly.

“What the fuck, then?” Geoff shouted, “What thefuck did you want to do?”

“I wanted to…” Michael paused, and realized that he didn’t know. He wanted to stop himself from hurting him, didn’t he? But the more he looked at it, the more selfish he felt; he was thinking for himself, not Gavin. He was protecting his own heart, not Gavin’s.

“Well?”

“I’m an idiot.”

“Yeah, you fucking are.”

“I don’t deserve to have Gavin forgive me as easily as he did—”

“No you don’t.” Geoff interrupted. Michael ignored it and continued.

“But he did, and I want to make it better, Geoff.”

“Why? What is he to you?” Geoff glanced back at the house, “You’ve been pushing people away for years. Why him, why  _now_?”

“I—” Michael froze, the words catching in his throat, lumping together and making it hard for him to breathe. He knew what Gavin was to him; he knew what had happened in their admittedly short time together. He just… he didn’t know if he could say it aloud just yet. “He’s different. He’s… important.” It sounded stupid, he knew that, but it would have to do. At least until he was ready to say the words he knew were the truth.

Geoff stared at him accusingly, but it seemed to content him enough to calm him down. “If you ever fucking do something like that again, I will personally rip your balls off.”

“I know.”

“Good. Get the fuck out now, training tomorrow morning.”

“Yeah?”

“Well I have to make sure both of you fucktards have a chance in the finals, don’t I?” Geoff said simply, walking back into his house and leaving Michael smiling like an idiot on his front lawn.

* * *

Training was going surprisingly well, and it felt good to be back in the water with Gavin. He could feel Geoff watching them; keeping his eye on Michael, but the hostility from the night before was no longer there. He knew that it was nowhere near forgotten, but for now it was water under the bridge. He kept his eyes locked on Gavin as he moved to catch his first wave, but his smile rapidly faded as he noticed the raw enjoyment he had loved watching had been replaced by cautious, predictable moves. Gavin even seemed to enjoy it less, and Michael had a feeling it was because of those idiots at the competition.

It took more willpower than Michael ever thought he could muster to keep his mouth shut throughout their hour-long session, and he could barely wait for Gavin to get out of ear shot before pulling Geoff to the side, “What’s he doing?”

“What?”

“That’s not how Gavin surfs. He’s reckless and stupid, but he’s got passion. What the fuck is he doing?”

Geoff glared at him, “Maybe if you had shitheads attacking you for being like that, you’d stop too.”

“Gavin wouldn’t let that get to him.”

“Yeah? Well he did.” He looked to where Gavin was waiting by his truck, his voice was much softer when he spoke again, “Poor kid got his spirit crushed.”

“I know they were jerks but—”

“No, Michael. You don’t know the half of it.” Geoff was angry again, his expression dark, “He wanted to quit. He wanted to go back to England and quit.” He didn’t wait for a response. Before Michael could even fully process what he said, they were both climbing into the truck.

“Wait!” He shouted, forcing his numb legs forward, “Gavin, wait!”

“Michael?” He called back, confused.

Michael plowed into the side of the truck, his hands gripping the car door tightly, stopping it from closing all the way. His heart pounded painfully against his chest, his breath coming in short bursts. “Stay with me today.”

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” Geoff said darkly.

“Please.”

Gavin hesitated, “I promised Millie I’d take her to the beach.”

“It’s important,” Michael pleaded. Gavin glanced back at Geoff, who sighed, but nodded.

“Alright, go on. I’ll let Millie know.” Gavin beamed at him, hopping out of the car and slamming the door shut behind him.

“I’ll see you later tonight, Geoff!” He sang happily, waving as the truck rumbled to life in front of them.

“Yeah, sure.” They watched him drive off, no more than in inch separating them. For the first time, Michael noticed the heat that came from him; the sparks it caused to dance up his arms.

“So what was so important that it had to be today, Michael?” Gavin asked. There was a curiosity in his voice, but not a hint anger.

“I just… I think we need to talk.”

“About what?”

Michael swallowed nervously around the rapidly growing lump in his throat. “Can we talk inside?”

“Sure!”

“I’ve just gotta put my board away, meet you in there?” Gavin smiled and nodded enthusiastically, practically bouncing up the stairs. Michael trudged down to the beach and picked up his discarded board. It felt heavy in his arms, like the weight of his fear was resting on top of it. He walked as slowly as possible, stalling the inevitable. In all honesty, Michael had never been so nervous in his life. He felt as if the direction his life would take from this point on rested on four simple words. He felt restless, nervous; more genuinely afraid than he had since he packed up his life and moved to the Big Island. At the same time, however, he was excited. Everything finally felt right. At last he knew for certain that this was what he wanted, and it was within his reach. All he had to do was reach out and grab it.

He found Gavin half-sitting, half-laying on his couch, feet propped up on his coffee table and head resting on the back of the couch. His eyes were closed, and Michael thought he might have fallen asleep, but Gavin’s eyes opened slowly as he heard him approaching. “Are you tired, Michael?”

“Nah, not really.”

“I’m exhausted.” He pouted, “Geoff has been so stubborn the past couple of days.”

“Yeah?” Michael sat down next to him on the couch. Gavin threw his legs across his lap, and Michael realized that he missed the familiar weight. “He can be tough sometimes, but he means well.”

“I think he’s disappointed in me.”

“He’s not.”

“He’s acting like he is.” Gavin argued, “He never smiles at me like he did when I started out.”

“Gavin…” Michael hesitated, the words on the tip of his tongue, hovering but unspoken. He didn’t want to hurt him, especially not now, but maybe if he knew…

“Yes, Michael?”

“Those guys were wrong, you know that right?”

Gavin looked confused, “What?”

“At the competition. The snakes.” He clarified. Gavin looked away from him, and Michael knew that he understood what he was talking about. “You’re not awful, you’re not an amateur. I was an idiot for not doing anything about it, and I’m sorry, but  _you’re_  an idiot if you let those assholes ruin you.”

Gavin frowned, “Pardon?” There was anger in his voice, laced with hurt and something that Michael couldn’t place, “I don’t think you know what you’re talking about.”

“Gavin, I saw you out there today. It’s like you don’t enjoy it anymore.” He tried to keep his voice soft, comforting, “The kid who just liked being in the water; just liked the feel of a board under his feet… you’re letting him slip away.”

“Well he wasn’t going to win any competitions, was he?”

“Yeah, he was. Because he was amazing.  _You_  are amazing, Gavin, and you can’t let yourself forget that.” Michael sighed, “You’re so incredibly—and naturally—talented. Don’t lose that because some fucktards think they’re better than you. Please, prove them wrong.”

“I don’t understand why you suddenly care so much.” Gavin was sitting up, moving so his feet were flat on the floor and his back straight.

“I’ve always cared, Gavin.”

“That’s funny, it never really seemed like you cared at all.”

“I’m not good at showing it, I never have been.” Michael scooted closer to him, putting a hand on his shoulder to grab his attention, “You’re important to me, okay? I’m sorry that I’m so shit at showing that.”

“No one’s ever said that to me before.” His voice was so small, so sad, that all of Michael’s sense left him. All of the plans that had been forming in his mind, all of the ways he was going to gradually admit his feelings to Gavin went out the window. Instead, he placed his hand gently on the side of Gavin’s faced and kissed him.

For a moment, everything froze, and then it was as if there was an explosion. Suddenly everything was hypersensitive. Michael could feel the warmth of Gavin, the inch separating them alive with sparks of energy. He felt the soft press of Gavin’s unmoving lips, and all too soon he forced himself to pull back. He stared into Gavin’s wide eyes, his hand still gently cupping his cheek. All at once, he realized what he had done, that Gavin hadn’t kissed him back; that Gavin hadn’t responded at all. He immediately dropped his hand and forced himself away,

“Fuck, I am so sorry.” Michael stammered, “Christ, I don’t know what I was thinking, I’m so—”

Before he could finish his apology, Gavin was throwing himself forward, his arms looping recklessly around Michael’s neck as he kissed him enthusiastically. Even through the shock, Michael returned the kiss. His arms moved to Gavin’s hips pulling him forward, closer, until they were pressed together. It wasn’t until they were both breathless that Michael forced himself to pull away. He would never forget how Gavin looked in that moment. His eyes shimmered and he was smiling in the way Michael had only seen him smile while in the water. His lips were red and slightly swollen, and it caused Michael’s heart to swell happily.

“Hey Gavin?” He breathed.

“Yeah?”

“I think I love you.”


	13. Chapter 13

The next few days passed in a haze of giddy happiness for Michael and Gavin. They were together—finally—and everything was amazing. The honeymoon phase, as some called it. But it was different than it usually was for Michael. Gavin wasn’t the type of person that Michael usually dated, and everything was so  _new_. They spent the week exploring their relationship, getting used to no longer having to put barriers up. They didn’t do anything special or different, but instead just let themselves do what they wanted; be it hold hands as they walked to Barbara’s store or kiss in the middle of a training session. Finally, they just let their emotions run free.

Even Geoff, who had been more than a little apprehensive and suspicious, was no longer able to dislike their relationship. Michael wasn’t sure if it was because he decided to trust him again, or if it was just because of how genuinely happy Gavin was and he really didn’t care either way. Possibly Michael’s favorite thing about their relationship was that Gavin was letting himself just enjoy surfing again. He was happy, and that showed in the water. Finally surfing was just surfing and they could enjoy themselves wholeheartedly.

Ray forgiving him, for the most part, was one of the better things to come along with it. He hadn’t realized how much he enjoyed hanging around with Ray until they met up again and Michael told him everything that had happened. Unsurprisingly, Ray was the least shocked out of everyone. “Dude, I’ve been waiting for you guys to bang for months now.”

Michael frowned. “We haven’t even  _know_  each other that long. Plus, we didn’t  _bang_.”

“Whatever, man. Point is I don’t give a shit and I saw it coming before you did.”

“Yeah, yeah. Don’t act like you’re all high and mighty. How’re things going with Joel, anyway?” Michael asked, smirking when Ray quickly adverted his gaze. “Still leading him on?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“C’mon, Ray. You may be blind to this shit most of the time, but even you have to have seen how he is around you.”

“He doesn’t know what he wants.” Ray said sternly. “Joel isn’t gay, Michael, and I’m not about to be an experiment.”

“I’m not gay, either,” Michael pointed out, but he let the subject drop.

“So where did you take him?”

“What?”

“Gavin.” Ray answered flatly. “Where did you take him for your date?”

“We, uh…. We didn’t go anywhere.” He coughed, “I mean, I haven’t taken him anywhere yet.”

“Well where are you  _planning_ on taking him?”

“I don’t fucking know. I haven’t decided yet.”

Ray sighed, “Hey, Michael?”

“What?”

“For once in your life, try to pull something together more than fifteen minutes before your date.”

* * *

Despite what Ray seemed to think, Michael  _had_ been thinking about what he wanted to do for their date. He’d fucked up enough already, he wanted to impress Gavin. He wanted to make him happy. But he was shit at this sort of thing. He didn’t  _do_  romantic crap. It was cheesy and gross and really fucking overdone. Everything he thought of made him cringe and feel stupid, and he knew that he would just make a fool of himself at the restaurant anyway. Or they’d run into a bunch of homophobic assholes, and knowing Gavin he’d let their annoying insults hit home.

It was largely thanks to his distaste of the public that Michael eventually decided to finally put his beach to good use and turn it into a restaurant of his own. All you ever heard about was how home-cooked meals were “so much more thoughtful and romantic” and shit, right? So that’s what Michael decided to do. He called Ray to forcefully enlist his help, since he’d been so eager to get involved before.

“A picnic on the beach? That’s so fucking cheesy, man.” Ray chocked out through his laughter.

“It’s not a picnic, asshole. Now are you going to help or not?”

“Yeah, yeah, alright.” Ray laughed, “I’ll call Joel and we’ll be over in a bit.”

Sure enough, Ray and Joel showed up a good fifteen minutes later. Ray was still smirking like an idiot, but Joel looked obviously annoyed to be dragged into it. He was fucking whipped. Michael almost immediately regretted enlisting Ray as his helper. He spent more time point out how “really fucking gay” everything was instead of seriously working. He conveniently let it slide that it had been  _his_ idea to do something cheesy and “gay”.

Still, they got it done in time and Michael had to admit that the finished product was a hell of a lot better than he was expecting. They’d actually turned the beach into something almost anyone would consider romantic. At the very least it was impressive for three guys who knew shit all about it. Even the stupid hanging Chinese lanterns Ray had insisted bringing looked good hung from the trees, and at least he wouldn’t have to worry about lighting once it started to get dark.

He checked, and double checked, that the table was set far enough back that the water would stay a good distance away from him, and then he started dinner. Which took considerably longer than he was expecting and resulted in him leaving to pick Gavin up an hour later than he was hoping at six. He arrived at the Ramsey residence at half-past, the door being opened by Millie to reveal the distinct noises of Gavin yelling in the background.

“Millie, how many times has Griffon told you not to open the door without someone there?” Gavin shouted as he slid around the corner, almost crashing into the opposite wall of the hallway.

“But it’s just Michael!” She said happily, “Do you think he’s here for our tea party?”

“I don’t think so, Millie. I don’t know how he’d know about it.”

She turned to him, and Michael wasn’t exactly what anyone would consider “soft”, but even so he wanted to give the little girl anything she asked for. “Are you here for the tea party, Michael? Captain America is about to fight Barbie for the last seat, but you can totally have it.”

“Actually, Millie, I’m here to talk to Gavvers. Is that alright?”

She frowned, but nodded. “I guess so.”

Michael waited for her to make a sign to leave, but she didn’t. “Can I talk to him alone?”

“Mom says that secrets are bad.”

“It’s not a secret, Millie, it’s just adult stuff.”

“But—”

“I’ll buy you ice cream,” Michael suggested, and she happily turned and skipped back down the hallway. For such a little girl, she sure knew how to get what she wanted. “So…” Michael said, “Are you free tonight?”

Gavin shook his head, “Geoff and Griffon are getting groceries. I have to watch Millie until they get back.”

“Oh.” Michael frowned, “Okay.”

“Why?”

“I wanted to take you on an actual date, but I guess it probably would’ve been a good idea to actually ask first.” Michael coughed, “I guess I’ll just see you tomorrow, yeah?”

“Michael,” Gavin called as he turned to leave, “Y’know they’ll be back in less than half an hour right?”

* * *

By the time Geoff and Griffon got back, the tea party was in full swing. Michael was seated between Gavin and an admittedly large Spider-Man plushie, Captain America sitting on the floor next to Barbie at his feet. Millie poured more imaginary tea into their cups and Michael couldn’t help but smile as Gavin animatedly drank from the empty cup.

He wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but seeing Gavin with Millie was probably one of his favorite things in the world. Gavin didn’t care that Millie was a kid, he genuinely enjoyed spending time with her. It could be because he thought on the same level as her, but Michael chose to ignore that fact.

Geoff, however, thought it was fucking hilarious and started laughing hysterically when he saw Michael cross-legged on the floor in front of the plastic blue table. Griffon was smiling too, but she at least had the decency to restrain her laughter, for the most part. She thanked Gavin for watching her, and then they were told to leave.

Gavin wouldn’t shut up as Michael drove to his house, but when they arrived Gavin went absolutely silent, possibly for the first time ever. He stared out over Michael’s beach with his mouth gaping, and Michael felt his confidence start to slip away as he watched him.

“It’s pretty fucking lame, I know.” He coughed, “If you want we can go somewhere else.”

“No,” Gavin said quickly, “I want to stay here. Did you cook for me, Michael?” He asked sweetly.

“I cooked three meals a day for you for a week, dipshit.”

“Yeah but…” Gavin pouted, “This is different.”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it.” Michael laughed, “Now can we go eat please? I’m fucking starving.”

He moved towards the table, Gavin hot on his heels. He pulled his chair out for him, trying not to feel like a complete idiot, and then moved to sit opposite him. The steak was cooked to perfection, as usual, but the beers looked really out of place in their ‘fancy’ dinner. Michael wondered if he should’ve gotten wine, if it ruined the mood to have something considered cheap. He hated that he was freaking out about everything, he wanted it to be just like it was before. Instead of the easiness their relationship had before, Michael spent most of his time worrying about whether or not he’d fucked something up, and he hated it. He didn’t want to  _be_  like every other stupid friends-to-couple couple, and fuck if he was going to sit by quietly and let it happen. So Michael did the first thing that came to mind and grabbed his plate, moving to sit on the warm sand instead.

“Michael?” Gavin asked from behind him, “Did I do something wrong?”

“No,” Michael sighed, “I’m sorry Gav, but I just… I can’t do this shit. It’s not  _right_ , we’re not this couple. At least, I didn’t think we were. I didn’t want us to be.” He shook his head, keeping his eyes locked on the ocean in fear of seeing what Gavin’s face looked like, “All I can think about is if everything is going how it’s supposed to go, and that’s not what I want. I don’t want this stupid fucking awkwardness.”

He heard Gavin let out a heavy breath, “Blood hell,  _thank god_.”

“What?”

“I hate this kind of stuff, Michael,” He admitted, “I’m really happy that you’d go to the trouble to do all this for me, but I’d rather just play Xbox or go for swimmy bevs or something. I like that.” He picked up his own plate and moved to sit next to him.

“Good, ‘cause this was a pain in the ass to do.”

“I can’t believe you did all this.”

Michael shrugged, “I made Ray and Joel help.”

Gavin took a swig of his beer, “Those two are a weird pair.”

“Agreed.”

* * *

They ended up getting absolutely trashed. Thinking about it, Michael realized that their evening had gone in almost the exact opposite direction he’d expected it to, but it went a hell of a lot better than he was hoping to. In hindsight, it was probably really fucking stupid to go swimming in the dark, especially while they were drunk off their asses, but to say it wasn’t fun would be a lie.

Somehow they both ended up on his bed, blissfully drunk and both soaking wet in nothing but their boxers. He numbly remembered, half asleep with a snoring Gavin draped across him, that he was supposed to be driving him home at the end of the night, but Michael was hoping Geoff would understand given the situation.

Lying there with Gavin, even wet and gross and cold, he felt happier than he’d felt in a long time. They had a bizarre relationship, but it was perfect for them. For once Michael felt like he could be himself. He knew Gavin would understand when he spent too much time in the water, hell he’d probably just join him.

As long as he managed to keep it good, he’d be okay. If he fucked up this relationship, Michael doubted he’d ever find someone as… it was cheesy as fuck, but as fucking great Gavin was for him. He lightly stroked Gavin’s hair out of his face, smiling at the completely unattractive expression he currently had on his face. He was so fucking far from perfect, and Michael really fucking loved him for it. 


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one has pictures. It also made me realize how much I miss Hawaii.

Michael woke to the sun shining directly into his eyes. He glanced over at the clock next to his bed, not at all surprised to see that it was six in the morning. His immediate reaction was to panic and rush out of bed, ready to grovel at Geoff for being late for training, but when he looked down at Gavin and saw how peaceful he looked, he couldn’t bring himself to move. So, for the first time in two years, Michael decided to have a skip day and went back to sleep.

When he woke up the second time, it was to find Gavin sitting cross-legged at the foot of the bed, gnawing on his bottom lip like he always did when he’d done something wrong. “You alright, Gav?”

“Michael!” He squawked. “Look at the time, we’re hours late for training!”

“Yeah, I know. I forgot to set an alarm yesterday night.” Michael sat up, rubbing tiredly at his eyes and feeling better rested than he had in years. “I figured we deserved a skip day.”

“A skip day? Are you bloody insane?”

“Gav. It’s one day, it’ll be fine.”

“But-”

“No, no arguments. You’ve been here almost a month and you’ve barely seen any of Hawaii.”

Gavin tried to pout, but Michael could see the curiosity in his eyes. He smiled, moving over so he was seated in front of Gavin. He lifted a hand, running it through Gavin’s messy morning hair until his hand rested on the base of his neck. Michael leaned forward, pressing his lips softly to his cheek, his thumb moving in soothing circles as his kisses trailed closer to Gavin’s lips. The kiss wasn’t rushed or intimate like most of their other kisses. It was like a whisper, a glimpse, and then all too soon Michael was forcing himself to pull away, though just enough to speak.

“Let me show you my island,” He breathed into Gavin’s lips, and this time there was no argument.

* * *

It took them almost an hour to get ready, despite neither of them doing anything other than changing out of their pyjamas. Each time one of them would attempt to get up, the other would pull them back against the soft, welcoming pillows and they’d find themselves lazily kissing, or simply laying together for another ten minutes until someone tried once again to get up. When they finally found themselves both dressed and situated in Michael’s car, it was almost half past 11.

“So what do you wanna see first, Gavvy Wavvy?”

“Lava. I want to see Lava, Michael.” Gavin’s eyes were wide with excitement. “Take me to the lava!”

“You’re fucking dumb.” Michael laughed, but soon enough they were on their way, preparing for a three hour long drive.

“How close can we get, Michael?” Gavin asked after a while, “Will we actually be able to see the lava?”

“Nah, not the active shit. We can go walk on the lava rock, though. It’s pretty fucking sweet still.”

“Alright!” Gavin said, but Michael could tell he was disappointed.

* * *

“Miiiichael,” Gavin whined for what felt like the thousandth time since they had left, “How much longer, Michael?”

“I don’t fucking know, an hour? An hour and a half?”

“Why is it so far away?”

“Because it’s a fucking huge island, Gavin.”

“But I’m bored!”

“Look out your window, idiot.”

“It’s boring!”

Michael sighed, “I don’t know what you want me to do about it, Gavin. I can’t go any faster.”

“Entertain me.”

“And how do you want me to do that?”

Gavin put his elbows on the center console, resting his chin in his hands so he could stare up at Michael with his stupid, big eyes. “Tell me why you like me.”

“No fucking way, that’s cheesy as fuck.”

“But Michael!” Gavin whined.

“No way.”

Gavin huffed out a breath, crossing his arms angrily across his chest and turning to face out the other window. “Stubborn.”

Michael sighed, “Your accent.”

“What?”

“I like your accent.” He repeated feeling his cheeks burn with embarrassment, and immediately Gavin was back in his previous position, beaming up at him. “And I like that you’re an idiot.”

“I am not!”

"Yeah, you are. But sometimes you’re actually really smart, and I think I like that even more.” Michael kept his eyes focused on the road, knowing that if he looked at Gavin he’d chicken out because he didn’t  _do_  girly shit like this. “I like that you’re awful at almost every video game, but you never let it stop you from playing. I like that, when you try, you can kick my ass in Halo. I like that you hate mornings but love training. I like that you don’t get mad at me when I’m an asshole, or get offended when I insult you. I love you because you’re the only person I’ve ever been able to imagine myself with in the long run.”

He took a deep breath, liking how it felt to have finally said all the shit that had been nagging at his brain, but he also couldn’t help but feel uneasy at how quiet Gavin was. He wanted to look over, get an idea of how Gavin was reacting, but he wanted more to disappear and hide. So when he felt Gavin’s lips pressed against his cheek, Michael was a little surprised.

“I think that is the most wonderful thing I have ever heard,” Gavin said softly, his breath tickling Michael’s ear with each syllable.

“Yeah, yeah. Just don’t get used to it.”

“Love you, you donut.”

* * *

They ended up stopping not fifteen minutes later for shave ice because Gavin “simply could not sit in the car any longer, Michael.”

He would never admit it, but he was glad for the stop. Driving sucked, especially when it was such a long fucking drive and the idiot next to you had the patience of a six year old. Plus, Michael hadn’t been able to stop thinking about how excited Gavin had been to see the  _real_  lava and he wanted to give him that, to surprise him.

So while Gavin spent a good ten minutes choosing three flavors of syrup and another five choosing the ice cream that went in the middle, Michael booked them a helicopter tour. He figured they could drive out the last half hour or so to the end of the road, walk along the lava for a bit, and then be back on the road by 3. He ended up booking a special dinner for them while he was at it, deciding right then to make this the best day he possibly could for Gavin. He’d never wanted to make anyone as happy as he wanted to make Gavin happy, and as much as he hated it, it made him happy. He’d finally found something good, and he was going to hold on to it if it was the last thing he did.

* * *

After shave ice, Gavin was considerably easier to deal with. Though he still asked how far they were every ten minutes, it was more him being an asshole and pulling at Michael’s nerves. When they did finally get there, Gavin was out of the car before Michael had the chance to shift it into park. Instantly he was half-running, half-skipping towards where the lava had overtaken the highway.

Michael made his way over at a much more casual pace. When he reached Gavin he had his phone out and was furiously tapping at the screen.

“Look at this!” He exclaimed, pointing to a half-buried road sign reading ‘road closed’. Gavin fell into another fit of giggles. “Bloody brilliant!”

Michael shook his head in disbelief, but he couldn’t help but laugh as well as he slipped his hand into Gavin’s. They moved across the lava rock, Gavin all but dragging Michael as he hurried across the bumpy surface.

“Oh my god, Michael look at that one!” Gavin exclaimed, pointing at a raised lava rock formation that reminded him too much of a stage. “I’m climbing up it!”

He staggered his way up the rocks, almost tripping more times than Michael was comfortable with. If he came back with a broken Gavin Geoff would kill him. Hell, Griffon would kill him. Thankfully Gavin made it safely to the top, and as he stood proudly with his hands on his hips facing towards the mountains, Michael couldn’t help but pull out his phone and take a picture.

“Michael, what are you doing all the way down there?” Gavin asked suddenly, “Get up here you donut!”

Michael shook his head, “I’m good down here.”

“But Michael!” Gavin whined, “The view up here is beautiful.”

“Yeah, well, mine’s better.” He teased, pleased to see Gavin blush before scrambling his way back down to Michael.

Just as Gavin leaned in to press a kiss to his cheek, Michael heard a little girl speak from behind them. “Mommy, isn’t that Michael?” She asked, drawing out his name in the same way Gavin did.

“Sweetie, no!” He heard, and he before he knew it the little girl was at his side, staring up at them with wide eyes.

“Excuse me Mister Jones,” She said politely, “I don’t wanna upset you but I watch you surfing every single time and I think you’re really, really good.”

Michael smiled, kneeling down to reach her level. “Is that so?”

“Yeah, but only on the TV,” She pouted, “Mommy and I live in California.”

“Really?” He asked, “Did you know that that’s where I started surfing?”

Her eyes flew open, “You did?”

“Yup. I used to go to California all the time.”

“That’s so cool!”

“Are you going to be a surfer when you grow up?”

She nodded quickly, “I’m already practiciting!”

“Good. I want to see you in the big leagues with me soon.”

“You’re so cool Mister Jones.”

Michael laughed, ruffling her hair gently. “Call me Michael, silly.”

“Okay, Michael.”

“What’s your name?”

“Charlie!”

“That’s a pretty cool name.” Michael said, just as her mother approached them.

“I’m so sorry about her, she’s just… a really big fan.”

“It’s cool.”

“C'mon, Charlie. Let’s leave the boys be now.”

“Okay, mommy.” Charlie said, immediately throwing herself at Michael, her arms tight around his neck. “Good luck in your competition Michael.” She said, and then she was skipping away alongside her mother.

“Michael Jones, you are a big marshmallow.”

* * *

Seeing Gavin as excited as he was by the simple lava rock was one of the most refreshing things. For the first time in a long time, Michael was seeing his island for all its beauty again through Gavin’s eyes. It only excited him more for what the afternoon had in store, though it proved an almost impossible task to pull Gavin away from the lava rock and convince him they should go back.

“But Michael,” He whined as they started back on their three hour journey. “It’s not even 3 o'clock, yet!”

“Yeah, but there were more tourists coming and I don’t want to deal with that shit.”

Gavin crossed his arms across his chest, pouting and angry as he stared out the front window. Michael couldn’t help but laugh.

“What?”

“You look like your twelve.”

“I do not.”

“You’re pouting,” Michael pointed out.

“I don’t understand why we had to leave.”

Michael sighed, “Just trust me, okay?”

For once, he did.

* * *

They barely managed to make it into Kona airport for 6 o’clock. He’d all but started ignoring Gavin after the first ten times he asked where they were going and why they were passing Michael’s house. By the time he was pulling into the airport, Gavin was panicking.

“Are you sending me home?” He asked, frantic. “Is that why Geoff hasn’t been calling me all day? Did you guys decide I’m not good enough? Michael? Michael!”

Michael parked his car and quickly turned to face him. “Relax, Gavin.”

“No, I can’t go Michael.” Gavin was shaking his head quickly, “I don’t want to go.”

“Gavin,” Michael repeated, hands reaching up to cup his face, “You said you would trust me, so trust me.”

He kissed his cheek before climbing out of the car and around to Gavin’s side, opening his door for him. There was a moment of hesitation before Gavin got out, slipping his hand nervously into Michael’s. He allowed himself to be lead towards the airport, and when Michael veered to the side, his grip tightened.

“Michael?” He asked quietly, “Where are we going?”

“Well, you said you wanted to see lava, didn’t you?” Michael smiled, tugging him gently over to where the helicopter was waiting, along with what he assumed would be their guide and pilot.

“Aloha!” The man greeted cheerfully. “Michael Jones?”

“Yup.”

“Welcome to Blue Hawaiian. I’m Greg, and I’ll be your pilot today.” He briefly explained the rules and safety guides, stressing on the fact it was an  _open door_  tour, and they were to  _under no circumstances_ remove their seatbelts. Gavin stayed silent next to him throughout the entire explanation, though his grip on Michael’s hand stayed strong. It wasn’t until they were both buckled into the helicopter with the headsets on that he spoke.

“Are you taking me on a helicopter tour?”

“Yes, I am.”

Gavin squeaked in response, flashing a huge grin. “When did you…”

“Well, I happen to be dating the world’s most indecisive eater.” Michael shrugged, “It took you almost fifteen minutes to  _pick_  your shave ice today, that was plenty of time.”

“It wasn’t sold out at that point?”

“I make a habit of not using surfer perks, but I felt like this was a good exception.”

“I can’t believe we’re doing this!” Gavin shouted as the blades started spinning loudly, and before they knew it they were off the ground and embarking on their 50 minute volcano tour.

The more time that passed, the more Michael kicked himself for waiting so long to take a tour. His island was beautiful on foot, but from up in the air? It was breathtaking. This was the first time he got to see the lava in real life, not through one of the 24-hour island channels. It was… amazing. He could understand why Gavin wanted to see it so badly. They could feel the heat radiating off of it, even from where they were in the sky.

Michael was mildly aware of Greg, still speaking to them in their ears, but Michael wasn’t listening. He was focused on Gavin, right next to him. He could almost  _feel_  his smile without having to turn around and look. And yeah, maybe this was one of those cheesy dates Michael hated and avoided like the plague, but it was worth it. Seeing him so incredibly happy, feeling as his heartbeat sped up where his chest was pressed to Michael’s shoulder… it was incredible, and he wouldn’t have changed a thing.

* * *

By the time they landed it was nearing 7. Michael had made reservations at a fancy restaurant, planning to go all-out on the cheese, but after their tour? He wanted to keep Gavin to himself. He didn’t want to deal with waiters and tourists and crowded restaurants. So instead he made a quick pit stop at a grocery store, ignoring Gavin’s constant questioning, and picked up enough food for a half-decent picnic before driving out to their rock.

He set out the food—a mixture of fresh fruit, crackers, deli meat and beer—before setting down next to Gavin, pulling him close so he could rest against Michael’s chest. The first couple of minutes were spent in giddy silence before Gavin spoke.

“Today was amazing, Michael.” He said quietly, eyes still watching as the waves crashed against the rocks rhythmically.

“I’m glad you liked it.”

“Thank you for doing all of that.”

Michael smiled, running a hand softly through his hair. “Thanks for putting up with me.”

Gavin turned around quickly, but he froze before he said anything, eyes locked on something behind them. Michael strained his neck, wanting to know who the fuck found them here, finding the one person capable of ruining their near-perfect day.

“Dan?” Gavin asked, nervousness in his tone as he pulled himself off Michael, “What’re you doing here?”

“I’m looking for you.” He said, crossing his arms. “Geoff came back pissed off because you two had disappeared.”

“I texted Geoff,” Michael said darkly, “He knew exactly where we were and why we missed training.”

“Yeah, a skip day right?” Dan scoffed, “Funny how that works, B.”

“What are you talking about?” Gavin asked.

He shrugged, “It just seems really convenient you’re missing training to be with your competition. Who doesn’t  _need_  any training.”

“What the fuck are you implying, asshole?” Michael growled through clenched teeth.

“I’m not  _implying_  anything. I’m pointing out facts, and the facts show that you’re dragging him away from training he  _needs_  if he has any chance at making it to spend the day lazing around with a trained, unbeaten professional right at the beginning of the competition season.”

“This has nothing to do with the competition,” Michael said sternly, “I wasn’t aware that spending time with Gavin would be such a problem, seeing that I’m  _dating_  him.”

Gavin whipped around to face him, eyes wide and panicked. Michael didn’t even get the chance to ask before Dan was, once again, butting in. “Dating?” He frowned at Gavin, “You’re dating this twat, B?”

“Yeah, he is. Problem?”

“Michael!” Gavin hissed before turning to Dan. “It’s not… it’s not like that, I swear.”

Michael felt his heart drop. “What do you mean it’s not like that?”

“Michael, that’s not what I—”

“What? You’re either dating me or you’re not, Gavin. There isn’t an in between.”

“I just…” Gavin looked between him and Dan. “I’m…”

Michael clenched his jaw. He knew what was coming, and he wasn’t about to sit through it, so he grabbed his backpack and abruptly stood up. “No, you know what? Whatever. Do what you want, Gavin.”

“Michael!” He heard Gavin scramble to his feet behind him, reaching out and grabbing his hand. Warmth spread up Michael’s arm, but he couldn’t get the smug look on Dan’s face out of his mind. “Michael, please.”

He shook his head, yanking his hand away and saying nothing as he made his way back to his car and drove off. He was confused more than anything, but he was also angry. At Gavin, at Dan, at himself. He had something good and it lasted less than a week. Why did he even fucking try. 


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of the end.

Michael spent the next week avoiding Gavin, and as a result, Geoff. He forced himself to keep training, but he locked his gates and ignored all phone calls. He knew it was immature and stupid, but frankly? He didn’t give a fuck. He put himself out there, threw his emotions down on a silver platter and handed them to Gavin, only for him to throw them on the ground. For once,  _he_  wasn’t the asshole;  _he_  didn’t fuck up. Michael just wished that made him feel better. It definitely didn’t.

On Thursday, Lindsay showed up at his house. He wanted to be angry at her for using her key-holding privileges to get in despite the signs that he put up suggesting he really didn’t want to see anyone, but when she walked into his living room and pulled him into her arms without a word, Michael felt an incredible sense of relief. He didn’t know how badly he needed someone who wouldn’t judge him, who would hold him and comfort him without trying to make him talk. He needed Lindsay. He didn’t deserve her, but he needed her, and having her there made him feel just a tiny bit less like his world was crashing down around him.

Michael didn’t cry. Maybe he should’ve, maybe it would’ve been good for him to, but he didn’t. He was heartbroken and hurt, but he was also angry. At Dan, at Gavin, at himself. Lindsay continued to hold him, her hands around his neck as she gently smoothed his hair. He pressed his face into her shoulder, his arms tightening around her waist. He took a deep breath, trying to compose himself before speaking. “I’m an idiot,” He said, finally. “A fucking moron. I can’t believe I let myself get close to him. That I thought for a moment I was good enough for him, that he actually felt the same way as I did.”

“Michael,” Lindsay breathed softly, pulling away from him just enough to make solid eye contact, “He does.”

Michael barked out a bitter laugh and pushed out of her arms, the comfort he had felt before was quickly diminishing. “Are you fucking kidding me right now?” He demanded. “He pretty much told Dan he didn’t— _wouldn’t_  feel that way about me. While I was sitting right there.” He ran a hand through his hair, forcing himself to take deep breaths.

“Look back on your relationship, Michael. Look at how you two were around each other. Think about the way he looked at you, how his face lit up and his eyes gleamed and  _tell me_  that wasn’t love.”

“He looks at Dan in the exact same way.” Michael pointed out, mind drifting back to their dates. Everything seemed to end with Gavin texting Dan a picture, eyes sparkling as he grinned down at his phone. “He’s always happiest when he’s talking to Dan.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it.” Lindsay said. “Those two are like brothers, and I know you know that. Yeah, it was fucking low of him to brush off your relationship like it was nothing, but seriously Michael? You two are the most emotionally constipated people I know.” She paused, head tilting to the side slightly in thought, “Except maybe Ray and Joel, but they’re a special case.”

Michael didn’t know what to say. On some level, he knew she was right. He knew that Gavin had feelings for him, but he no longer knew what to think of them. Gavin couldn’t even fucking admit their relationship to the one person he was closest to, how was that supposed to make him feel? How could he feel confident that Gavin would stay if he couldn’t… Michael shook his head. “No, fuck it. It’s over.”

“Michael…”

“No, I’m done Lindsay. He can go fuck himself. Hell, he can go fuck Dan for all I care. I’m sure they’ll make each other very happy.”

Lindsay frowned, “You’re acting like a child.” She told him, standing up from the couch and throwing her set of keys down on the table, “And I am done dealing with it. When you finally pull your head out of your ass, give me a call.”

Michael felt an overwhelming sense of dread as he watched her walk out of his life. He felt like he should do something, he  _wanted_  to do something, but he didn’t. This is what should’ve happened when they broke up, this is what he  _deserved_. And hey, he’d gone this far. Might as well fuck over all of his relationships.

* * *

When Ray showed up the next day Michael wasn’t surprised. Angry, maybe, that people wouldn’t just take a hint and fuck off, but definitely not surprised. The fucker was determined when he wanted to be. So it really didn’t shock Michael he went to the trouble of paddling all the way from the public beach a couple blocks down to his own. Still, it was more than a little terrifying to open his bedroom door to find Ray, dripping wet, unmoving, and furious.

“What are you—”

“I am so fucking done with your bullshit.” Michael sighed, pushing past him and making his way into the kitchen. Unfortunately, Ray followed. “You guys are fucking pathetic. Why don’t you just stop dicking around and be with each other? You’re not twelve. This isn’t some sort of stupid little crush that you don’t know how to deal with. You’re 26. Grow up.”

“You’re not one to talk, asshole.” Michael spit, “You won’t even  _look_  at Joel half the time because you’re embarrassed that you like him, that you fucking like each other.” He crossed his arms, staring Ray down even as his expression darkened into something angrier than Michael had ever seen. “Grow up.”

“You can be a real dick sometimes, you know? A serious bag of dicks. You don’t know the situation with Joel and I, and you wanna know why? Because you don’t fucking  _listen_ to me. I tried to be your friend, but holy fuck you were having none of it. You would barely say a word to me outside of matches, and then Gavin showed up. Then I was important, you needed me to help you pull your head out of your ass.” Ray took a deep breath, obviously trying to calm himself as his chest rose and fell heavily. “And I dealt with it, because I thought maybe you would start putting something into this friendship, thought maybe you’d care a bit. Wow was I wrong though, right? I’m nothing more than competition to you, an obstacle that you can’t overcome because I’m slightly less assholish than the other idiots at our level. But that’s all, right? I was never anything close to friends with you, because you don’t  _have_ any friends. Because you don’t  _let_  yourself have friends. It’s fucking stupid and pathetic and you’re an  _ass_.”

Michael stared at him, mouth hanging open ever so slightly. In the years that he’d known Ray, he’d never heard him say so many things at once that actually, y’know, meant something. He liked to talk, but half the time it was sly comments or jokes. He didn’t just… say important shit. That wasn’t who he was. Then again, he apparently didn’t know Ray very well.

“Well, aren’t you going to say something? Defend yourself?”

“No.”

Ray’s voice rose an octave, “No?” He laughed bitterly, “No of course not. Why would you?”  Michael watched him shake his head, staring determinedly out the window at the waves, crashing gently against the warm sand. Ray’s board was there, strewn unceremoniously just out of reach of the waves, waiting for him. “If you would’ve paid a bit of attention, you’d know that Joel and I have wanted to be together for a while now, but there’s complications that come with us getting in a relationship. Real, validated complications, not whatever bullshit you’re trying to pull with Gavin. If you would’ve asked about something not related to yourself for once, you would’ve known that. But thanks for belittling us, asshole.”

With that, he turned and walked out without waiting for a response. For the second day in a row, Michael watched one of the most important people in his life walk out of it.

* * *

Michael was not looking forward to competing. He didn’t want to go down to the beach and have Ray ignore him, have Geoff glare at him angrily, have Gavin… well, he didn’t know what Gavin would do. But he definitely wasn’t ready to see him quite yet. Still he’d worked too hard to get to where he was to throw it away because of a few relationship troubles. So he did what he always had: he dragged his ass out of bed at half past fuck off, had a light breakfast, and drove down to the beach.

He was one of the first to get there, but he usually was. It was habit, even if Geoff wasn’t forcing it on him this time. He got a small smile and wave from one of the female judges, a regular by the looks of it, but he couldn’t bring himself to play nice and wave back. Instead, he busied himself with waxing his board, forcing himself to ignore everyone around him as the beach began to crowd.

“Jones.” Someone said from above him, Michael looked up and saw one of the biggest assholes of their level.

“Jensen.”

“Where’s your little boy toy?” He asked, eyes scanning the beach. He smirked, focusing on something over Michael’s shoulder, “Is that him over there, with tall, dark and mysterious?” Michael knew he shouldn’t look, that he needed to stay focused. He looked. Sure enough, Gavin was sitting with Dan, smiling and laughing, waxing his own board. Michael felt his anger boil, jaw clenched tight and body stiff.

“Oh, did you get dumped?” Jensen asked. “Guys,” He called over his shoulder, “It looks like our favorite little couple of dumbasses split.”

Two other guys, Blackwell and Barker if Michael remembered correctly, made their way over. Blackwell smiled, “Looks like the stupid British twink found someone else to fuck, hey?” The other two laughed, heads thrown back, and that was it. Michael snapped. He threw himself onto Blackwell, fist pulled back and ready to punch.

“The fuck did you say, asshole?”

“Oh, looks like someone’s jealous.” He replied, completely unfazed. “Such a shame, really. I mean, if you can’t even hold onto that idiot, who the fuck are you going to date?”

“Shut the fuck up.” Michael growled.

“Oh, did I hit a nerve?”

“I said shut the fuck  _up_.” Michael repeated, voice louder.

“Michael?” He heard someone—Gavin, it had to be Gavin—ask from behind him. His voice was quiet, questioning, but strong. “What are you doing?”

Blackwell’s smile grew, “How cute. He doesn’t want to be with you anymore, but he still cares. How did you fuck that one up, by the way?”

“Shut the fuck up!” Michael shouted, pulling his arm back again, but before he could make contact with Blackwell’s stupid fucking face, someone grabbed his forearm and pulled him off, throwing him backwards onto the sand.

“Get the fuck out of here,” Geoff said from above him and, amazingly, the three listened. “What the hell were you doing?”

“They’re assholes, they had it coming.”

“So you’re that guy now?” Geoff asked, “Randomly getting into fights and getting disqualified? Throwing your career away?”

“Someone needs to teach them to mind their own business.”

“Yeah, it’s not going to be you. If I see it happen again I’m going to personally kick your ass.”

“Why do you even care? You’re not—”

“We’re having a talk about that later because yes, I am still your coach. Right now, though? You’re on your own. Good luck.”

* * *

“What a great competition, hey guys?” The announcer, who was way too overenthusiastic, asked. “It came pretty close there in the end, but I have our standings here!” He waved his clipboard around a bit, and the crowd cheered. “In third place we have Michael Jones!”

There were more cheers as he made his way over to the podium, but they were subdued. People were shocked, confused. He never lost, and third was as close to losing as he could get. He accepted the medal from the announcer and stared blankly out over the crowd, head held high. He caught sight of the girl from his and Gavin’s trip standing front row, her mother behind her. Michael didn’t see disappointment in her eyes like he was expecting, she was still happy, still clapping. She didn’t care he came in third, and now he wished he could’ve won for her, so she could’ve seen that in person.

“In second we Gavin Free!” The announcer said happily, “There were those who had their doubts about Gavin, but look where he is now, eh?”

Gavin beamed as he received his medal, stepping onto the podium and waving at the crowd, who were going crazy. Or Dan, who was smiling in the way that parents always do when their kids do something right. Michael wanted to punch the look right off his face.

“And last, but certainly not least, we have our first place winner. This guy has been competing alongside Jones since they both started two years ago, always coming up second to him. But now he’s taken the lead and proved just how awesome he can be when he wants to. Ray Narvaez Jr.!”

Michael watched as Joel nudged Ray forward, smiling fondly at him as he went. Ray looked more jubilant than Michael had ever seen him as he made his way through the crowd and to the podium, where he was handed his trophy. Michael could almost  _feel_  the joy radiating off him as he stood there between him and Gavin, and despite his disappointment in himself, despite the fact that Ray currently hated him, he felt proud. He’d been watching Ray come second to him for so long, it felt good to see him up there, first. He deserved it.

Ray pulled Gavin up, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. He turned to Michael, tentative but obligated to offer. Partially to spare Ray the trouble, but mostly because he couldn’t deal with it himself, Michael stepped off the podium of his own accord and walked away. He picked up his board, fully prepared to leave, when Charlie barreled into him, wrapping her arms tightly around his waist.

“You were so good today, Mister Jones!” She squealed happily. And despite how much he disagreed, Michael smiled. He put a hand on her head, messing up her hair just a bit.

“Thanks, Charlie.”

“That was so cool!”

Michael chuckled, placing his board back on the sand and kneeling down to her level again. “Yeah? I’m glad.”

She poked the medal still hanging from his neck, “Do you have a lot of those?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“I hope I get a medal someday,” She said quietly.

“I know you will.” Michael said, and he believed it. She had passion, that’d get her pretty far. Still, he pulled his medal off and draped it around her neck. “I want you to have this one, for luck.”

Charlie beamed up at him, eyes wide with glee, “Really?”

“Yeah, sorry it’s not a first place.”

“That’s okay, I think this one is even more special than a first place one.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because you got to stand up there with your bestest friends.” She said simply, “It doesn’t matter what place you got, silly!”

Michael felt his heart clench, but he smiled. “That’s right.”

“Thank you Mister Jones!” She said again, hugging him tightly once more before running back to where her mother was, a soft smile on her lips. Michael smiled sadly as he watched her go, retrieving his board and standing up. He looked over to the crowd, to where Gavin was standing surrounded by people, still close to Ray, though his attention was focused on Michael. When they made eye contact, he quickly looked away.

Michael made his way over to Caiti, who always sold flowers on the beach on the competition days. “Hey Michael, good job out there today.” She said.

“Thanks.”

“Are you…?”

“Can I get a rose?” He asked, and her eyebrows shot up.

“Uh, sure. Any color?”

“Red, please.” Caiti nodded, grabbing one of the red roses she had brought. Michael went to grab his wallet, but she shook her head.

“You never buy flowers, Michael. Obviously it’s important, don’t worry about it.”

He took the rose from her, nodding. “Thanks.” He said, and then made his way over to where Joel was standing. “Hey.” Joel said nothing, “Look, can you just… Can you give this to him for me?” Michael asked, handing him the flower. Joel gave him a questioning look, but nodded and grabbed the rose from him, glancing back to Ray momentarily.

“Am I telling him who it’s from?”

Michael sighed, “I don’t think it matters anymore.”

With that, he walked away from the beach, from his friends, his family. As it was referred to here, his ohana. Except… he was already forgotten. And maybe that was for the best.


	16. The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it. The last chapter. Wow, was it ever a journey. I started this story about 7 and a half months before I finished it, and let me tell you there were times I didn’t think I’d see the end of it. It was thanks to the amazing support I got both here and on Tumblr that I did see it to the end. Because y'all rock. So thank you. If you’ve been here since chapter 1, you’re amazing. If you didn't give up on me when I stopped posting to AO3 and still came back to read this, you're even better. If you’re a new reader, thanks for taking the time to catch up. Almost a year later, and close to 30,000 words and this is finally the end. I know I say it a lot, but seriously thank you.

> _What’s a soul mate? It’s a… well, it’s like a best friend, but more. It’s the one person in the world that knows you better than anyone else. It’s someone who makes you a better person. Well, actually, they don’t make you a better person… you do that yourself—because they inspire you. A soul mate is someone who you carry with you forever. It’s the one person who knew you, and accepted you, and believed in you before anyone else did, or when no one else would. And no matter what happens… you’ll always love them._

After the competition, Michael headed to his spot. He felt like he should go home, close himself in again and not come back out until the next round, but he itched to feel like he was part of something again. That something was the waves as they crashed against the rocks, the wind as it rustled through the trees. He was part of the island. Here, on his rock, he could pretend that nothing happened, that Gavin had never shown up and infiltrated his life. Try as he might, he couldn’t want that for himself anymore. He’d always hated when people told him it was better have loved and lost, but it was dawning on him that maybe, unfortunately, they were right.

His time with Gavin, however brief, made him want to be better. It made him wish he could be the love Gavin deserved, the friend Ray had wanted, the athlete Geoff needed. When he was with Gavin he wasn’t just some guy with a freak talent. He was someone important, not just a trophy. Lindsay was right, Michael had fallen in love with Gavin. There were times where he hated it, where he wanted nothing more than to hate him, but in the end he knew that Gavin was it. Gavin, with his childlike glee towards everything, with his raw passion and determination. Gavin, who was the most annoyingly stubborn person he knew, ended up being the one Michael wanted to spend every day with. He wanted to do all the cheesy dumb stuff they both hated and be there as he continued to amaze everyone he met.

A part of him wished Gavin would show up like he had a habit of doing. That he would laugh as Michael tried to apologize and tell him there was nothing to be sorry for, as he always did. He wanted to have him in his arms again and kiss the stupid grins off his lips. Maybe if this was a movie that would happen, but it was real life. Gavin didn’t come.

* * *

When Michael finally went home, he found Ray waiting for him. In his house. Which Michael was pretty certain he locked. Yet there Ray was, sprawled out on his couch, Xbox controller in hand like it was no big deal, like he hadn’t almost given Michael a heart attack.

“What the fuck, man?” He demanded, clutching his shirt.

“I’ve been waiting for you since, like a half hour after the competition,” Ray shrugged, “I gave up and just broke in like an hour ago.”

“Well I wasn’t exactly expecting company tonight, so excuse me for being late.” Michael said, lifting Ray’s feet off his couch and dropping them back onto the floor.

“You gave me a rose, man. It’s practically a marriage proposal. Time for you to take responsibility for it.” He threw his feet onto Michael’s lap. “Feed me as I game!”

Michael smiled, even as he rolled his eyes. Just like that, he was forgiven. A simple, small gesture and he was back in Ray’s good books; they were cool. “Sorry for being a dick.” Michael said anyway, stealing his controller back so he could set up a multiplayer game.

“I’ve gotten used to it.” Ray replied, “What I’m not used to is you taking responsibility for it.”

“Yeah, well. Don’t get used to it.”

“Wouldn’t want to.”

They fell into a comfortable non-silence, filled with groans and curses (largely on Michael’s part) as one of them died. It’d been a while since they had gamed together—too long, really. Michael didn’t realized how much he missed it. Missed Ray in general. “So… what’s going on with you and Joel?” He asked in between rounds.

Ray paused, just long enough for it to be noticeable. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Really? Because if I remember correctly, you told me to ask.”

“I was angry, I wasn’t thinking straight.”

Michael wanted to make a joke, but instead he took the mature route and said, “Ray.”

“Look, it’s complicated okay?”

“So you’ve said.” Michael reminded, “But I’ve been going to you with all the Ga—all my crap. It’s my turn to listen to you, so talk to me.”

Ray sighed, sitting up straighter and dropping his controller into his lap, hands moving under his glasses to rub at his eyes. “We both realized we want to be together a while ago, but every time I try anything,” Michael grimaced, getting a glare in response, “Even something as innocent as holding his hand,” He clarified, a blush still shadowed on his cheeks, “he panics. Asks me if I’m sure I want to date someone so much older than me.”

“Which you don’t care about.”

Ray nodded, “Which I don’t give a shit about. But Joel? He does. He cares a lot, apparently.” He laughed bitterly. “He treats me like some sort of innocent child whose virtue he has to protect. It’s fucking annoying.”

“Well why don’t you just, I don’t know, prove how much you’re  _not_  that innocent virgin?” Michael asked, “I mean, in my experience just kissing someone will do pretty well to shut them up. How do you think I got Gavin to…” Michael trailed off, biting down on his own tongue. “Well, you get my point.”

“Dude, what the  _fuck_  happened between you two?” Ray asked, “I get that you, like… broke up, or whatever. But what did he do to you?”

“I guess it’s what he didn’t do.” Michael groaned, “I just, I feel so stupid, y’know? I put myself out there, like  _really_  out there, and he can’t even humor me enough to tell his best friend?”

“So he didn’t tell Dan, so what?”

“It’s not that he didn’t tell him, it’s that he told him ‘it wasn’t like that’, that  _we_  weren’t like that. Which I definitely thought we were.”

“Michael.” Ray said. “It’s Gavin.”

“Yeah, but… He just denounced it all. Like it was nothing.”

“Does Dan even know he’s gay, man?” Ray questioned, “I mean, if he’s even gay. If you’re not just an exception like he is to you.” Michael frowned, “Think about it. If he’s not, imagine what that must have been like for him. To have his best friend, the guy he’s been with through everything, his brother pretty much, catch him on a date with a guy? It probably scared the fuck outta him.”

“I…” Michael hesitated. “I didn’t think about that.”

“Did you even let him explain?” Ray asked. “Or did you immediately come and lock yourself in your house?”

“I might have.”

“Fucking hell, Michael. Let the poor guy at least try to give an explanation.” Ray shook his head, “You two are worse than Joel fucking Christ. What would you do without me?”

“I would probably spend the rest of my life alone and miserable.”

“Yeah, well. Don’t speak too soon. The idiot probably thinks you hate his guts, for fuck sakes.” Ray got up, moving towards his kitchen and muttering about how he should get paid for the amount of couples therapy he does.

* * *

“No.” Geoff said as soon as he opened his door, and immediately slammed it shut.

“Geoff!” Michael shouted, “Geoff, c’mon!”

“I warned you Michael,” came his reply. “Once I can deal with, but I’m not letting you get that kid’s hopes up again.”

“I didn’t do anything!” Michael shouted back, but his voice quickly lost volume at the sounds of Geoff’s retreating footsteps. “It’s not my fault this time.”

Still, he wasn’t about to give up. So Michael sat down, right there on their door step. His back was pressed against the cool wood and if he listened he could hear Millie in the living room watching Star Wars and, presumably, playing with her dolls. He could hear Griffon’s voice, quiet but stern, and Geoff’s, also hushed but much angrier. It was obvious they were arguing about him.

The door opened a while later, and Michael’s heart jumped. But it only opened enough for Millie to peer at him. “Michael, what are you doing?”

“Waiting.”

“For what?”

“For Geoff to let me in.”

Millie bit her lip. “Are you here to see Gavin?”

“Yeah.”

“He’s been really sad,” She said softly. “It makes daddy really mad, but he’s sad too I think.” She reached an arm through the crack in the door so she could pet his curls. “I think they miss you. I miss you.”

“Miss you too, Millie.”

“Are you going to come back soon?”

“I hope so.”

“Me too.” She said softly. “I have to go now, Michael.”

“Okay.”

“Are you going to stay here?”

“Yeah.” Michael nodded, “As long as it takes.”

* * *

Not a half hour later, Michael heard footsteps again. He didn’t know if he felt pathetic, or proud, to know that they were Gavin’s. Still, hearing his voice alone made Michael’s heart jump. “Michael,” He said, “You need to leave, you’re scaring Millie.”

“Not until you come talk to me.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Why not?” Michael asked.

“Geoff wouldn’t like it.”

“Please, Gavin?”

The door, amazingly, opened. Gavin slipped out and Michael scrambled up. He opened his mouth to speak, but the words caught in his throat as his eyes fell on Gavin. He looked sad and heartbroken, but there was hope there. The gleam in his eyes Michael loved so much was there, hiding behind a forced indifference. Somewhere, though Michael wasn’t sure where, Gavin felt the same as he did when they were flying over the volcano. Everything Michael wanted to say left his brain in one fell swoop replaced with one thing, screaming to be said. So he said it. “I love you.”

It was the first time he had said it, plain and clear. There was no more “think”, because he didn’t think he loved him anymore, he knew. And he knew that Gavin noticed that too. He heard the hitch in his breath, and maybe he was imagining it, but he could’ve sworn he heard Gavin’s heartbeat speed up, too. So he kept speaking. “When you showed up a month and a half ago, I thought you were going to be nothing but a pain in the ass. When I found out you were going to be staying with me, I was thinking of places on the island I could successfully hide a body. Yet you grew on me, you made me love you. You’re fucking annoying and you talk way too much without actually saying anything, but you see things that I don’t anymore, or… didn’t. Until you showed up. You brought life back to my island, back to surfing. Fuck, back to  _me_. And I fell in love with you, and now I’m here, yet again on the brink of losing you and it’s driving me fucking insane because I don’t know what I would do without you in my life, okay?”

Michael took a deep breath, taking a step closer. When Gavin didn’t back away, he took it as a good sign and let himself reach out to cup his face in one hand, thumb running gently over Gavin’s cheek as his other hand moved down to hold his hand. “I don’t know why you said what you did, and yeah it hurt. That doesn’t mean I’m not at fault, though. I should’ve stayed, I should’ve answered your calls. I love you, and sometimes that’s going to hurt, but I want to be with you so long as you’re willing to be with me.”

He closed his eyes, just for a moment, as he tried to calm his heart. It was the most honest he’d been with anyone. Michael had literally laid out all of himself for Gavin, and now? Now it was out of his control. Now it was up to Gavin. Time ticked by at a snail’s pace. What was likely only seconds felt like hours as he waited for Gavin to say something,  _anything._  Instead, he felt the press of warm lips against his own. Michael smiled through the kiss, his hand on Gavin’s face pulling him deeper as he felt Gavin’s lips curve into a smile as well. It was rough and largely teeth and desperation, but it didn’t matter. It was perfect, in Michael’s books, because Gavin was there.

They were rudely interrupted by Geoff opening the door. “Seriously guys?” He asked, forcing them apart with a hand on the back of each of their necks. “You’re hopeless, both of you.”

“But Geoff—” Gavin started.

“Inside.”

“Geoff—” He tried again, but when Geoff threw a glare his way he stormed inside.

“Geoff,” Michael sighed, “I know I’m a dick, okay? I fully realize I don’t deserve him, but I’m selfish. I love him, and I can’t just give up on that.”

“I know.” Geoff’s shoulders drooped forward, “I know. But he’s… he’s like my kid, okay? You both are, but with Gavin…” He glanced back towards the house, “He wants to see the good in everything. That kid would jump off a cliff if someone told him it was the right thing to do. I want him to be happy, Michael, but I don’t want him moving into something he’s not ready for.”

“I want nothing but for him to be happy, Geoff.” Michael said.

“You make him happy. You make each other happy. But neither of you seem to know how to deal with that.”

“We have our problems, but at the end of the day… Gavin is the most important thing in the world. I’d do anything to keep him happy. Safe.” He took a deep breath, “I don’t know if I can be without him anymore, to be honest. I know we still have a long way to go, a lot to figure out, but I’m willing to deal with that for as long as he is.”

Geoff frowned, studying him. Slowly, he nodded and stepped to the side. “His room is out back. Go.”

* * *

Michael all but sprinted through the house, throwing a polite hello over his shoulder at Griffon and Millie. He was sure she was largely why Geoff came around, but he was focused on Gavin. More specifically on picking up where they left off before Geoff rudely interrupted. Really, he should’ve known Dan would be with Gavin. Where else would he be? Still, seeing him stopped him dead in his tracks. Both Dan and Gavin turned to look at him, and for a minute time seemed to freeze. Then, all at once, everyone was moving. Before he had the chance to react, Dan had him pinned to the wall. Michael would like to blame it on the British military training he had, but really he just wasn’t expecting such a… physical reaction. Almost immediately Gavin was there, yelling for them to stop.

“Well?” Michael asked bitterly, setting his jaw. “Are you going to hit me, or what?”

“Dan, don’t.” Gavin said immediately.

“It’s fine, Gav.” Michael said, “If he wants to hit me, if that’s what it’ll take, fine.” He spoke directly to Dan. “Do it.”

For whatever reason, he really wasn’t prepared for the punch when it came, but suddenly he was slumping to the ground, winded and clutching his stomach painfully. Gavin was there instantly, hands shaking as they hovered over him, unsure of what to do. “What the hell was that?” He hissed over his shoulder, “What were you thinking?”

Dan shrugged, “He told me to hit him.”

“So you did?!” Gavin shoved at his chest; Dan didn’t budge. “Are you bloody mental?”

“Gavin.” Michael interrupted. “It’s fine.”

“Fine?” He squawked. “Michael he hurt you.”

“I’m fine.” He stood up, ignoring Gavin’s squeak of protest to glare at Dan. “Better?”

“A bit.”

“Good.”

“Yes, great, as flattering as it is to have two strapping young men fighting for my honor or whatever, I am not a helpless maiden and I would appreciate it if you two would keep it in your pants.” Gavin said, all in one breath. “Well, for now. I might make an exception for you when Dan is gone,” He said to Michael, dead serious. Michael couldn’t hide his grin, but Dan visibly tensed. “Now do you two think this can be handled civilly, or should I go get Geoff to kick both of your asses?”

They spent a solid moment just glaring at one another, but Michael knew what Geoff was capable of and didn’t move. Dan apparently had some brains and stayed still himself. Gavin smiled, “Good.”

Silence fell over them again, Michael glaring at Dan and receiving a stern glare in return. Gavin glanced between them, and then put his hands on his hip. “Dan, this is Michael.” He said, “He’s—he’s my boyfriend. I think. If he’ll have me?” Michael didn’t say anything, knowing Gavin had to say what he had to say. But he nodded. “I’m not gay, I don’t think, but I love him a lot.”

Michael smiled and took his hand, thumb stroking soothingly against the back, encouraging him silently onwards. “And Michael, this is Dan. He’s my best friend, my brother, and you can’t be jealous of him because the idea of getting in his pants is gross.” Michael snorted, “And I would really like to have you two get along because you’re the most important people in my life, okay?”

“He hurt you.” Dan said sternly.

“I’m emotionally stunted,” Michael said, “I’m working on it.”

“That’s not good enough.”

“Dan,” Gavin interrupted, “It’s a part of being in a relationship. We’re going to have our problems, but we always make it through. Michael’s even getting better at pulling his head out of his ass.”

“It’s true, I am.” Michael nodded seriously, “And I would like to not have Gavin’s best friend hate my guts. I would much prefer you tolerating me.”

Dan pursed his lips, and Michael held his breath. “I guess I can do that.”

Gavin’s posture immediately relaxed, “Oh thank god. Halo?”

Michael smiled and allowed himself to be tugged towards the couch. “Okay.”

* * *

Michael looked around his living room. At Ray and Joel; at Geoff and Griffon; at Jack and Caiti. At Gavin and Lindsay, even Dan. This time last year he would’ve been counting down the minutes until it was socially acceptable to kick them out of his house. But now? Now he felt like he was a part of something. A part of this Ohana that he had created. Well, not created, but that he was a part of. He couldn’t even try to pretend he was responsible for it when they were the ones who persistently stuck around, even when he pushed them away.

Still, he felt at home here, with everyone around him. His house didn’t feel empty anymore, and having everyone there dicking around and enjoying themselves made him feel warm inside, not that he would ever admit to that. He felt certain that this was the best it was going to get, and he didn’t care how goddamn cheesy that was. He’d spent too long lying to himself because he didn’t feel like he deserved something good, and that was it. This was it. He was happy and god dammit, he was going to let himself be happy.

He watched as Joel pressed a kiss to Ray’s temple, a gentle smile dancing on his lips as Ray talked animatedly about whatever videogame had his interest at the moment. They may not be perfect, but they were certainly getting better. Making progress, which Michael finally realized was the point of being in a relationship. It wasn’t going to be perfect from start to finish, and sometimes he was going to want to kill Gavin, but at the end of the day they made each other happy, and that would get them through anything life threw their way.

His eyes moved down to Gavin, who was currently seated between his legs on the floor, back pressed against the back of the couch and head lazily resting on Michael’s stomach. His eyes were drooping shut, even as he tried to follow the conversation. Michael glanced over at Dan just in time to catch his smile. Dan may not love him, but even he couldn’t help but know their relationship was a good one. He caught Michael’s eye and nodded, a sign that they’d be okay. Eventually.

Michael’s focus again moved to Gavin. He pressed a gentle kiss to the top of his head, hand moving soothingly through his messy hair. “You tired?” Michael whispered.

Gavin shook his head. “M’alright.”

“I can ask everyone to go if you want to sleep.” Michael said softly, watching as Gavin’s eyelids fluttered open and closed. He was obviously struggling to stay awake.

“No, don’t.”

“Gav, you’re tired.”

“I’m fine, Michael.” He replied stubbornly, drawing out Michael’s name in the way that made his heartbeat quicken.

“Alright, alright.” Michael didn’t say anything else, but he continued running his hand through Gavin’s hair. Within minutes he felt Gavin go limp against him, his lips parting slightly as he fell into sleep. Michael smiled down at him, and then tugged at Lindsay’s sleeve.

“Yeah?” She turned her attention towards them and immediately broke out into a huge grin. “Oh.”

“Is it okay if we start clearing people out?”

“Yeah, ‘course. Just lemme…” She picked his phone up off the coffee table, snapping a picture of them. “Perfect. You guys are fucking cute as hell.”

Michael definitely didn’t set the picture as his wallpaper.

* * *

Carrying Gavin into his room without him waking up was surprisingly easy. Michael wasn’t sure if it was because he was a heavy sleeper (unlikely) or because he was so emotionally exhausted he was practically comatose. When he finally made it into his bedroom, he placed Gavin gently down under the covers. Almost immediately, Gavin was curling up into a ball, smiling softly into the pillows. It was a sight Michael could definitely get used to, and one he was looking forward to seeing more of. As much as he wanted to crawl in next to Gavin, it was only ten and Michael really wanted to clean up a bit before the morning. He moved out of his room as quietly as possible, inching the door closed behind him.

Cleaning took almost no time. He removed the empty beer bottles that littered his living room and kitchen, and then threw out the paper plates they had used for pizza. He still didn’t find himself tired after cleaning, so he grabbed a lukewarm beer and moved to sit out on his porch. It was a calm evening, the air warm and still. He watched the waves crash softly against the shore, the moonlight gleaming and brightening his backyard.

He couldn’t imagine himself anywhere better than where he was, with anyone better, or doing anything better. Some people worked their whole lives trying to achieve their dreams, many never succeeded. Yet here he was, with everything he could possibly want, and more. Because he had Gavin, which Michael never thought he would have good fortune of having. He still felt like he didn’t deserve him, but with each passing day it felt less like a dream, and more like he was just incredibly lucky. He wasn’t afraid that he was going to wake up to find Gavin gone anymore. It took him a while, but he was finally able to accept that he was allowed to be happy, that he deserved Gavin. And it felt good.

A while later, his porch door opened. Gavin came and sat down next to him, legs tucking up underneath himself as he rested his head on Michael’s chest. “Hey.”

“Hi.”

“You kicked everyone out.”

“I did.”

“I told you not to,” Gavin said, turning his head so that he could make eye contact with Michael, “You didn’t have to make everyone leave for me.”

“It’s okay.” Michael shifted, putting his arm around Gavin and pulling him in towards his chest, “Geoff and Griffon had to get home to Millie, Dan went with them. Everyone else has work tomorrow. Except Ray, but Joel’s his ride home.”

“Okay.”

“Plus, they understood that you’re tired.”

Gavin didn’t say anything for a moment, and when he spoke, his voice was quieter. “Hey Michael?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you too.”


	17. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... I almost forgot there was an Epilogue. But this it this time!

Really, Michael shouldn’t have been surprised to find a picture of him and Gavin front and center of  _Carv_. He was more shocked their relationship, or previous lack thereof, wasn’t a more popular topic, what with Burnie and Gus both being close friends with Geoff, who seriously couldn’t keep his mouth shut when he was drunk. Then again, that was largely why Burnie and Gus were his favorite pair; they didn’t fuck you over if you were a half-decent person. Blackwell, on the other hand, headlined the magazine every other week.

He definitely wasn’t pleased, however, with their headline of choice.  _“Bubbly Brit Gavin Free Finally Surfs into Michael Jones’ Heart—The epic tale of how 2 nd place World Champion Free found himself in a steamy relationship with Michael “Rage Quit” Jones”_. There were a few other headings, one about him securing his 1st place title at Worlds along with Gavin and Ray in 2nd and 3rd, respectively. As much as he would love to have reflected on how the fuck they pulled that off, he really couldn’t think about anything other than how he could get away with murdering the assholes.

“I’m a ‘bubbly Brit’?” Gavin asked, arms wrapping around Michael’s middle from behind, his chin settling on top of Michael’s head, which had slammed down on the top of the kitchen table a few seconds prior. “’Steamy relationship’, hey? Don’t know if that’s what I’d call this.”

“This is horrible,” Michael grumbled. He felt Gavin’s lips at the base of his neck, pressing gentle kisses right below his hairline. “They made me look like a fucking teenage girl!”

“It’s not so bad, love.” Gavin said, lips moving against Michael’s skin, making him shudder. “I like it, it’s catchy.” He could feel Gavin smile against his skin.

“You’re an asshole. This is going to ruin the image I’ve been carefully building over the past two years.”

“And what image was that?” Gavin asked, moving to mouth underneath his ear, and leaving a sloppy, wet trail of kisses on his neck. “Closed off asshole with the emotional capacity of a teaspoon?”

“Yes.”

“So you’re angry that people know you’re in love, we’re in love? That this relationship is incredibly cheesy and gushy because you’re a softy?” Gavin loosened his grip on Michael’s waist enough to spin him around, and suddenly he was right there, nose to nose with him. He could feel Gavin’s breath dancing along his lips, he could see all of the swirls of color in his eyes. “Is that a problem, love?”

Michael didn’t answer. Instead, he fisted a hand in Gavin’s T-shirt and pulled him even closer, pressing their lips firmly together. Sometimes Michael hated how cheesy Gavin made him, how pathetic he knew it would make other people see him. Yet in this moment, with Gavin warm and soft in his arms, he couldn’t find it in himself to give a fuck. Not a day went by where Michael didn’t wonder how he convinced Gavin to be with him, how he could feel such unyielding, unrivaled love for one person. It’d been over a year since they finally decided to just give it a shot, and that stupid ‘honeymoon phase’ everyone talked about had never ended. Gavin was it for him. He was the one Michael knew he wanted to spend every minute of every day for the rest of his life with him. He loved Gavin more than his island and more than surfing, more than anything. And that would never change.

Maybe he wouldn’t say that enough, maybe they would fight more than they would agree. None of it mattered because he knew that they’d figure it out in the end, as they always did. He had no doubt in his mind that he would grow old with Gavin, and that he’d love every minute of it. He knew that he would gather up the courage to finally take the ring he had bought so long ago and give it to Gavin, because even though they still had their problems they were both happy, and that wasn’t going to change.

But Michael didn’t say any of that aloud, not yet at least. He just said, “No.”


End file.
